Sunday, February 10, 2008
The Gospel According to Joel Osteen
Making light of the theological depth of Joel Osteen is akin to shooting fish in a barrel. It is just way too easy. I would never do that. I'll let Chris Lehmann do it, here. A few gems, collected below.
"Even many good, godly people have gotten into a bad habit of slumping and looking down...[Y]ou need to put your shoulders back, hold your head up high, and communicate strength, determination, and confidence."
"get in the habit of smiling on purpose"
"It doesn't please God for us to drag through life like miserable failures," he scolds. The Creator "wants you to succeed; He created you to live abundantly."
"If God had a refrigerator, your picture would be up on it. If God carried a wallet, your photo would be in it."
The Osteen Creed:
"This is my Bible. I am what it says I am. I have what it says I have. I do what it says I can do, I am about to receive the incorruptible, indestructible, ever-living seed of God, and I will never be the same. Never, never, never. I will never be the same. In Jesus' name. Amen."
Lehmann is having none of it.
Mr. Osteen's rigid – and plainly dangerous – nominalist faith sits uncomfortably alongside an obsession with blood heredity, which seems to contradict the notion of a purely spiritual and supernatural health-care plan....an eerily collapsible spiritual narcissism that downgrades the divine image into the job description for a lifestyle concierge.