129
Come let us make an effort; come let us fall down before God, let us steadfastly lament and shed tears before Him, that He might grant us spiritual enlightenment.
Discern the wiles of our enemy, the adversary who hates all good, who places in our path pitfalls and seductions, ruinous acquisitiveness, commendation of this age, carnal pleasure, as well as the expectation that this life will last for long, fear of ascetic struggles, a slothful attitude toward prayer, drowsiness when psalms are sung, and bodily rest.
We are as apathetic and careless as he is assiduous. We are as inattentive as he is crafty, even though we know that our days have been shortened, that the time has come and the Lord of glory will come in the majesty of His beauty with the terrible powers of His kingdom to reward everyone according to his deeds.
I fear that the Lord's promise might be fulfilled with respect to us: that many shall come form the east and the west, from the north and from the sea, and shall sit down with Abraham and Isaac and Jacob in the kingdom of heaven; but we shall be driven out.
I beseech Thee, O Christ, light of truth, born of the blessed Father, being His image and the radiance of His hypostasis, Who sittest at the right hand of His majesty, Who art my life and the praise and joy of those who love Thee: save me, a sinner, in thy kingdom and reward me not according to my deeds, but save me according to Thy grace and have compassion on me according to Thy kindness, for Thou art blessed and glorified unto the ages.
130
Why does the image I have taken on mislead me? Why am I a stranger to virtue, committing repulsive deeds before God who sees all?
Justly did the pharisees suffer to have their errors exposed by Christ the Savior, Who labeled their appearances hypocrisy. And I deserve such reproach most of all. But when my conscience exposes my errors I become indignant, for the truth is bitter for those who desire just to make an appearance rather than being.
Indeed, if one were to peel away my appearance, he would find worms inside. If the whitewashed cover is removed, everyone will see what lies in the grave. However, let this not be brought out into the open here; surely the fire will try all and discover what I am at the judgement.
Woe is me! How will I endure the exposure of my lawless deeds and thoughts!....Have mercy on me, O god, according to Thy great mercy and according to the multitude of Thy compassions absolve my iniquities. Hearken unto me according to Thy goodness, O Master, and reject not my supplication; for Thou dost not cast away those who truly repent.
It is true that even my repentance is impure, for I spend one day repenting and two offending Thee. But send my heart fear of Thee and confirm my soul on the rock of true repentance. May the light of Thy grace overcome the darkness that is in me.
Condescend to my prayer, O good Lord, not because I am correct, for in me is no good, but according to Thy compassion and Thy great and unutterable goodness. Raise up my members shattered by sin; enlighten my heart clouded by evil desire; save me from my sinful habits, that the adversary may not overthrow me in the end.
131
Thy grace has made it possible for me to call upon Thy name, O Lord. O only good One, Who hast created us all, forgive the transgressions and sins of Thy sinful and ungrateful servant.
I know, O Lord, that my sins exceed those of all other men, but I have as my refuge the abyss of Thy compassions which exceeds all things. I am confident that Thou wilt accept and have mercy on all who approach Thy goodness, for it pleases Thee to behold repentance, and Thou rejoicest at the ascetic struggles of Thy servants.
Grant me, Thine unworthy servant, tears, that with an enlightened mind, with love and faith, I may entreat Thine incomparable goodness and be cured of my hidden sores. Show miserable me Thy charity. Deliver me from the torment I deserve. May Thy grace be preached all about, to the benefit both of the countless multitudes who are careless, and me as well.
As Thou didst fill the water pots with Thy blessings, so likewise fill my heart with Thy grace and Thy goodness. When a caring mother is rejected by her child, she does not scorn him, for her motherly care triumphs over all; may my sins likewise not surpass Thy grace.
I know that I will be punished even for idle words, for evil thoughts, for mere desire. Yet as soon as an opportunity to satisfy my pleasures presents itself, I immediately forget everything, and like a fool indulge in all manner of sin. I am a vainglorious, wrathful cripple, a lazy, dissolute glutton, a sensualist covered with impurities who hourly strays into error--and I do not realize it.
Only hope in the manifestation of Thy grace, O man-befriending master, consoles me and keeps me from despair. Whether Thou so desirest or not, save me, O all-good Lord, according to Thy great kindness.
132
As if I were standing before Thy terrible throne, O Lord, i who am condemned see both my deeds exposed and the judgement Thou wilt pass on miserable me, to remove me from Thy holy face and cast me into unbearable torment. and just as I will call upon Thee at that time, so now do I cry out, trembling and with tears: just art Thou, O most just Judge, and just is thy judgement, that commits no error in judging me.
As if I were standing in that place, I address the angels: O kind and most radiant angels, shed tears for me, for I did not even have mercy on myself. I scorned God's mercy, and it is truly fair that I be punished. The Lord offered me mercy, but I lacked discernment and never paid it proper attention; and now with good reason does He turn from me.
Then, of course, the angels will tell me in anger: this is not the time for repentance, but for reckoning. Prayer no longer has any power, and tears of repentance are of no consequence. Here there is an abundance only of tears shed in torment. Here are heard not sighs of contrition, but ceaseless groans and cries of pain. Go and receive the bitter and harsh reward for your deeds. Burn in flames like impure matter, fueling the inextinquishable fire of gehenna. Enjoy, for you are a son of obscurity and love everlasting darkness. Gaze upon the black apparitions for the sake of which you have disdained the eternal light--and be glad.
There, in that place will be endless weeping and fervent gnashing of teeth. Alas, my poor soul stripped of all deeds, how shalt thou gazed upon the impartial Judge, the angels and archangels, and those born on earth there present in infinite numbers?
Alas, how thou shalt suffer then, my soul, but thou wilt not be heard. Everything will change, everything will be different. The righteous will rejoice forever and sinners will endure eternal torment. They brought no joy to the God of all, and shall themselves be alien to all joy unto the ages.
So let us cry unto God, O soul, while we are here: save us, before we perish unto the end!
Saturday, April 19, 2008
A Spiritual Psalter from the works of our Holy Father Ephraim the Syrian
125
When you stand before God, recall those who serve earthly authorities. take the example of slaves before their masters when considering your position.
Recall your sinfulness and call upon God's assistance. Learn from the saints and ask for God's grace in the fulfillment of any task. Be not proud of god's grace and do not succumb to lawlessness.
If you succeed in doing good, do not praise yourself above men. If you sin through ignorance, do not lose heart because you are a man. Boast not of your successes, and do not despair when you sin.
Actively strive for good and harbor an equal hatred for evil.
Do not pas judgement when you give advice, for you know not God's mysteries.
it is better for you to be delivered to the sword than to succumb to anger. It is better to hide anger in the heart than to express it.
Do not indulge in empty chatter, and do not sit in places where passionate conversation is held. seek not gratification in laughter and pleasure in jokes, that you might not become distracted.
Be not fond of gatherings teeming with crowds, for they engender commotion in the soul.
Avoid banquets, in order not to become a debaucher even in the absence of women.
Avoid delicacies, that you might not become passionate. Take care to bridle the flesh, that it might not plunge its rider--the mind--into danger.
Master your senses and protect them from corrosion by rust as a warrior protects his weapons.
Spend the better part of your time in seclusion, that you might be able to discern what is and is not beneficial for you when you are in the society of people.
126
Behold, let no one say: I have committed many sins--there can be no forgiveness for me. He who says this does not know that God is the God of the penitent, that He came to earth not to save the righteous, but to call sinners to repentance, and that when someone repents the heavens rejoice over him.
True repentance consists of withdrawing from sin and nurturing hatred for it. For, lo, when someone says from his heart: I have hated deceit and been repelled by it--then God accepts him with joy.
But behold, also let no one dare to say: I have not sinned. He who says this is blind; he has shut his eyes. He deceives himself and knows not that Satan is robbing him blind--both in word and deed, through all of the senses, sight, hearing and touch, and through thoughts. For who can boast that he has an innocent heart and that all his senses are pure?
No one is sinless, no one is clean of defilement, no man is free from guilt except Him alone Who for our sake was impoverished though He was rich. He alone is sinless Who took upon Himself the sins of the world, wants all men to be saved, desires not the death of a sinner and is a lover of mankind, abundantly benevolent, kindhearted and sincerely loving.
Let us Also run to Him, for all sinners who have run to Him have found salvation.
127
At the terrible judgement the Lord will say to those at His right hand: come, O sons of My light, blessed heirs of My kingdom. Come, ye who for My sake have been impoverished, hungered and thirsted, who loved not the world nor all that is in it. come, ye who for My sake have left all worldly power and joy, brothers and friends, parents and children. Come, ye who have dwelt in deserts, on mountains, in caves and crevices in the earth together with beasts, and rejoice with the angels in heaven. Come, all ye who are merciful and hospitable. Come, all ye who have walked the strait and narrow path. come, ye who are blessed of My Father; inherit the kingdom that has been prepared for you since the creation of the world.
And to those at His left hand He will say: go away from Me, into the fire that lies without. Go away from Me, ye heartless ones, who have hated both brothers and Christ. Ye were not merciful and neither shall ye obtain mercy. Ye did not heed My noble gospels and My blessed disciples--and neither shall I heed your lamentation. You lived a life of luxury on earth, enjoyed good things in your life, and here there is nothing more for you to receive--you have already taken what is yours. Daily I called out to you through the Scriptures, but when you heard, you mocked those who read them. And now I say to you: I know you not. go away from Me, Ye accursed souls, into the eternal fire that is prepared from the devil and his angels.
And they will enter into eternal torment, but the righteous will enter into eternal life.
128
As the Creator, Thou knowest what Thou hast created. As the Judge, Thou knowest what Thou hast condemned (after the fall). As the One Who become man, Thou knowest what Thou hast designed for our salvation.
Thou gavest me an undefiled nature, but my father Adam has covered it with much impurity and made it infirm. To this impurity have I added enjoyment of vain things--and now I involuntarily endure punishment. Corruption has infected my very nature, and so I am distressed, like one caught in a storm at sea.
Have mercy on me, as my Creator. Be sympathetic toward my infirmity, as the One Who became man for my sake. Reject me not because of my passions, but instead scatter them, in recognition of my will to strive. Do no disdain me on account of my impurity, but instead attend to my contrition and desire to better myself.
If Thou art repelled by my defiles thoughts, turn Thine attention to my lamentation and to the way I condemn myself for my own sensuality.
I have the will but I cannot say that I have the strength. I give what I have. Consider my situation and if it pleases Thee to give me what I lack, grant it to me.
I am a pauper, robbed by the serpent. I am infirm, bound by corruption. I lack strength, for I am overwhelmed by sin. I have lost Thy gift and therefore lack perfect understanding. I have lost communion with Thee and therefore know not where I am headed.
I have nothing. If anything is found in my possession, it is because Thou hast taken pity on me and given it to me. I am exceedingly poor; if I am to become rich it will all be a gift from Thee. It will all be Thine, just as it was Thine before.
I beg only for grace--I confess that if I am to be saved, I shall be saved through Thee.
When you stand before God, recall those who serve earthly authorities. take the example of slaves before their masters when considering your position.
Recall your sinfulness and call upon God's assistance. Learn from the saints and ask for God's grace in the fulfillment of any task. Be not proud of god's grace and do not succumb to lawlessness.
If you succeed in doing good, do not praise yourself above men. If you sin through ignorance, do not lose heart because you are a man. Boast not of your successes, and do not despair when you sin.
Actively strive for good and harbor an equal hatred for evil.
Do not pas judgement when you give advice, for you know not God's mysteries.
it is better for you to be delivered to the sword than to succumb to anger. It is better to hide anger in the heart than to express it.
Do not indulge in empty chatter, and do not sit in places where passionate conversation is held. seek not gratification in laughter and pleasure in jokes, that you might not become distracted.
Be not fond of gatherings teeming with crowds, for they engender commotion in the soul.
Avoid banquets, in order not to become a debaucher even in the absence of women.
Avoid delicacies, that you might not become passionate. Take care to bridle the flesh, that it might not plunge its rider--the mind--into danger.
Master your senses and protect them from corrosion by rust as a warrior protects his weapons.
Spend the better part of your time in seclusion, that you might be able to discern what is and is not beneficial for you when you are in the society of people.
126
Behold, let no one say: I have committed many sins--there can be no forgiveness for me. He who says this does not know that God is the God of the penitent, that He came to earth not to save the righteous, but to call sinners to repentance, and that when someone repents the heavens rejoice over him.
True repentance consists of withdrawing from sin and nurturing hatred for it. For, lo, when someone says from his heart: I have hated deceit and been repelled by it--then God accepts him with joy.
But behold, also let no one dare to say: I have not sinned. He who says this is blind; he has shut his eyes. He deceives himself and knows not that Satan is robbing him blind--both in word and deed, through all of the senses, sight, hearing and touch, and through thoughts. For who can boast that he has an innocent heart and that all his senses are pure?
No one is sinless, no one is clean of defilement, no man is free from guilt except Him alone Who for our sake was impoverished though He was rich. He alone is sinless Who took upon Himself the sins of the world, wants all men to be saved, desires not the death of a sinner and is a lover of mankind, abundantly benevolent, kindhearted and sincerely loving.
Let us Also run to Him, for all sinners who have run to Him have found salvation.
127
At the terrible judgement the Lord will say to those at His right hand: come, O sons of My light, blessed heirs of My kingdom. Come, ye who for My sake have been impoverished, hungered and thirsted, who loved not the world nor all that is in it. come, ye who for My sake have left all worldly power and joy, brothers and friends, parents and children. Come, ye who have dwelt in deserts, on mountains, in caves and crevices in the earth together with beasts, and rejoice with the angels in heaven. Come, all ye who are merciful and hospitable. Come, all ye who have walked the strait and narrow path. come, ye who are blessed of My Father; inherit the kingdom that has been prepared for you since the creation of the world.
And to those at His left hand He will say: go away from Me, into the fire that lies without. Go away from Me, ye heartless ones, who have hated both brothers and Christ. Ye were not merciful and neither shall ye obtain mercy. Ye did not heed My noble gospels and My blessed disciples--and neither shall I heed your lamentation. You lived a life of luxury on earth, enjoyed good things in your life, and here there is nothing more for you to receive--you have already taken what is yours. Daily I called out to you through the Scriptures, but when you heard, you mocked those who read them. And now I say to you: I know you not. go away from Me, Ye accursed souls, into the eternal fire that is prepared from the devil and his angels.
And they will enter into eternal torment, but the righteous will enter into eternal life.
128
As the Creator, Thou knowest what Thou hast created. As the Judge, Thou knowest what Thou hast condemned (after the fall). As the One Who become man, Thou knowest what Thou hast designed for our salvation.
Thou gavest me an undefiled nature, but my father Adam has covered it with much impurity and made it infirm. To this impurity have I added enjoyment of vain things--and now I involuntarily endure punishment. Corruption has infected my very nature, and so I am distressed, like one caught in a storm at sea.
Have mercy on me, as my Creator. Be sympathetic toward my infirmity, as the One Who became man for my sake. Reject me not because of my passions, but instead scatter them, in recognition of my will to strive. Do no disdain me on account of my impurity, but instead attend to my contrition and desire to better myself.
If Thou art repelled by my defiles thoughts, turn Thine attention to my lamentation and to the way I condemn myself for my own sensuality.
I have the will but I cannot say that I have the strength. I give what I have. Consider my situation and if it pleases Thee to give me what I lack, grant it to me.
I am a pauper, robbed by the serpent. I am infirm, bound by corruption. I lack strength, for I am overwhelmed by sin. I have lost Thy gift and therefore lack perfect understanding. I have lost communion with Thee and therefore know not where I am headed.
I have nothing. If anything is found in my possession, it is because Thou hast taken pity on me and given it to me. I am exceedingly poor; if I am to become rich it will all be a gift from Thee. It will all be Thine, just as it was Thine before.
I beg only for grace--I confess that if I am to be saved, I shall be saved through Thee.
Monday, April 14, 2008
A Spiritual Psalter from the works of our Holy Father Ephraim the Syrian
121
How shall I mourn the blindness of my soul? How shall I mourn my calamitous ignorance of my own self? How shall I mourn my passionate and unrepentant arbitrary exercise of my free will? The ascetics are comforted, consoled by the Holy Spirit; but I agonize and complain of the wretchedness that is caused by my own apathy. I have sunk to the level of the senseless beasts and become like unto them. Wretched as I am, I have been stripped by my own laziness, because I alienate myself from those who stand vigil and pray.
Regard me with mercy, O Master, from Thy holy heights. Look upon the impenitence of my poor soul, and by the judgements that Thou knowest, have mercy on me and correct me. As if standing before Thy throne and touching Thine immaculate feet, i beseech and beg Thee with contrite heart: have mercy on me; show Thy loving-kindness to Thy creature; freely convert me by Thy grace.
I know that Thou canst do all things and that nothing is impossible for Thee. Wait not for my corrupt will to exercise itself, for I lack the ambition to correct myself.
May every visible and invisible being weep for me, who have grown old in sins and passions. Weep for me who appear to those who see me to be chase, yet inwardly am ever adulterous.
122
Take an interest, at lats, in your salvation, O sinner. Seclude yourself, collect your thoughts and say to yourself: how much time have you spent feeding the lusts of your flesh and imagination, and what benefit has it brought you; what have you attained by doing this? Alas, my soul, what a state we have reached, what disorder!
Look--everyone around me is adorned with virtues and truly fears God; but I alone walk in darkness. Early in the morning do I repent of my deeds, yet a short while later I commit even worse errors. The Lord has given me strength and health and lo! I take this for granted and incur the wrath of my Creator.
Why art thou so apathetic, O my soul? Why art thou so careless? After all, thou canst not stay here forever. When the end comes, the Lord will send His angel to get thee and thou wilt have to leave this place whether thou so want or not. What then?
Acknowledge at last your extreme wretchedness, O man, and stop contradicting Him Who created you and opposing His commands. Boldly say to the enemy who seduces you:
You, O devil, made me an object of shame for angels and men when I took your irreverent advice. You inspired me to think: for once I will satisfy my craving and lo! this small act became for me a great abyss and I gave myself up to your shameful desires. The water found a small crack and made of it a big crevice.
You have clouded my mind with impure thoughts and hurls me from sin to sin. You have annihilated my restraint on the pretext of bodily infirmity. You have alienated me from prayer and vigilance. You have implanted in me love for money, excusing this with the approaching long years of old age. You have dried up my tears. You have hardened my heart. You have made me stray from obedience to Christ. You have multiplied my distractions. You have made me insubordinate. I have reached the point where I fail to labor over needful things and occupy myself with vain endeavors instead. You have taught me envy and slander. You have made me haughty, irritable and wrathful. You have taught me gluttony, drunkenness and sensuality. You have trained my thoughts to scatter while I read and sing psalms; thus I pray and do no know for what; I read psalms and meanwhile I surrender my thoughts to unrestrained wanderings.
Having thus exposed the wiles of the enemy, tell him with conviction: I have had enough of you, O devil. And leave the evil one and join yourself to the man-befriending God. Are you wounded? Despair not. Have you fallen? Get up and say bravely: now i have begun. Fall down before your merciful master and confess your sins.
But before you say anything he will already know what you intended to say. Before you open you lips, He will see what is in your heart. You will not be able to say, "I have sinned," before you see Him stretch forth His hands to receive and embrace you.
Approach with faith and He will cleanse you straightway as He cleansed the leper, lift you from your bed as He lifted the paralytic, and raise you from the dead as He raised Lazarus.
123
I who am all covered with sores run to Thy loving-kindness. Accept my sighs as Thou didst accept the tear of the harlot.
Thou knowest, O Master, the failings of human nature. Remember that from his youth evil thoughts press diligently upon a man and be not wroth with me to the end, but open to me Thy hand and the door of Thy loving-kindness. May my recklessness not surpass Thy solicitude.
Accept, O Master, and hearken unto mine impure and unworthy supplication, Thou Who savest those who hope in Thee, Who rejectest not the prayer of sinners, Who stretchest forth Thy hand to those who have been cast to the ground. Guide me in fear of thee and give me tears of contrition.
I have lifted up the mental eyes of my soul to Thee, O Lord. Cast me not away from Thy face, for blessed is Thy name unto the ages.
124
I have incurred Thy wrath with my sins, O Lord; but it is against Thy will that Thou art wroth, for Thou overflowest with abundant mercy and Thy majesty is beyond provocation.
Thou art a sea of compassion and our errors are but a drop of tainted water. Surely one drop cannot disturb and unencompassalbe sea.
Thou dost not become anxious when Thou art displeased, and Thou art not wroth when Thou punishest. If Thou wert to become wroth when Thou punishest, the world could not withstand Thy wrath.
Thy blows are filled with love. Thy punishment burns with compassion. I accordance with Thy love, even when Thou punishest Thou strivest only for good.
The staves with which Thou punishest are carved from the wood of thy loving-kindness. No matter what Thy staff touches, the blow brings great benefit.
When a master punishes his pupil, he bats him not out of hatred, but because he wishes to bring him profit; and out of love does he meter out punishment. Thy blow also strikes from love, for Thou dost not punish out of malice. Thou, O Lord, desirest our own good, and Thou showest Thy lovinng-kindness in many ways.
It is not difficult for Thee to endure our errors, for Thou hast created our nature. Thou art not burdened by Thy creation,f or Thou knewest us before we were created.
Who will endure the hardships of caring for a baby if not the mother who bore him? Who will endure the errors of the world, if not the Lord of all?
It is easy for the Creator to endure all the difficulties wroth by His creatures, for if He had not wanted to endure these difficulties He would not have created them.
Will a woman forget her child or fail to love those who issue from her womb? But even if a woman were to forget her child, God will not forget the world He has created.
His natural compassion was moved, and He conceived and bore creation. Like a babe from his mother's womb, so did the world come forth from His will.
And lo, He gather up and carries the world, like a mother carries the fruit of her womb, feeding it with her milk.
The kindhearted father bore us and nourishes us with the blood of His Son. Thus does a mother give her child her papas to suck, in order to feed him.
A babe sucks at the breast and receives fro his mother the food that he requires. He draws out all the food he needs from his mother's paps.
A babe does not know how to turn away and search for food anywhere else than at his mother's side. Thus the world also takes life-sustaining nourishment only from Thee, O Creator; and no one but thee alone can feed it.
How shall I mourn the blindness of my soul? How shall I mourn my calamitous ignorance of my own self? How shall I mourn my passionate and unrepentant arbitrary exercise of my free will? The ascetics are comforted, consoled by the Holy Spirit; but I agonize and complain of the wretchedness that is caused by my own apathy. I have sunk to the level of the senseless beasts and become like unto them. Wretched as I am, I have been stripped by my own laziness, because I alienate myself from those who stand vigil and pray.
Regard me with mercy, O Master, from Thy holy heights. Look upon the impenitence of my poor soul, and by the judgements that Thou knowest, have mercy on me and correct me. As if standing before Thy throne and touching Thine immaculate feet, i beseech and beg Thee with contrite heart: have mercy on me; show Thy loving-kindness to Thy creature; freely convert me by Thy grace.
I know that Thou canst do all things and that nothing is impossible for Thee. Wait not for my corrupt will to exercise itself, for I lack the ambition to correct myself.
May every visible and invisible being weep for me, who have grown old in sins and passions. Weep for me who appear to those who see me to be chase, yet inwardly am ever adulterous.
122
Take an interest, at lats, in your salvation, O sinner. Seclude yourself, collect your thoughts and say to yourself: how much time have you spent feeding the lusts of your flesh and imagination, and what benefit has it brought you; what have you attained by doing this? Alas, my soul, what a state we have reached, what disorder!
Look--everyone around me is adorned with virtues and truly fears God; but I alone walk in darkness. Early in the morning do I repent of my deeds, yet a short while later I commit even worse errors. The Lord has given me strength and health and lo! I take this for granted and incur the wrath of my Creator.
Why art thou so apathetic, O my soul? Why art thou so careless? After all, thou canst not stay here forever. When the end comes, the Lord will send His angel to get thee and thou wilt have to leave this place whether thou so want or not. What then?
Acknowledge at last your extreme wretchedness, O man, and stop contradicting Him Who created you and opposing His commands. Boldly say to the enemy who seduces you:
You, O devil, made me an object of shame for angels and men when I took your irreverent advice. You inspired me to think: for once I will satisfy my craving and lo! this small act became for me a great abyss and I gave myself up to your shameful desires. The water found a small crack and made of it a big crevice.
You have clouded my mind with impure thoughts and hurls me from sin to sin. You have annihilated my restraint on the pretext of bodily infirmity. You have alienated me from prayer and vigilance. You have implanted in me love for money, excusing this with the approaching long years of old age. You have dried up my tears. You have hardened my heart. You have made me stray from obedience to Christ. You have multiplied my distractions. You have made me insubordinate. I have reached the point where I fail to labor over needful things and occupy myself with vain endeavors instead. You have taught me envy and slander. You have made me haughty, irritable and wrathful. You have taught me gluttony, drunkenness and sensuality. You have trained my thoughts to scatter while I read and sing psalms; thus I pray and do no know for what; I read psalms and meanwhile I surrender my thoughts to unrestrained wanderings.
Having thus exposed the wiles of the enemy, tell him with conviction: I have had enough of you, O devil. And leave the evil one and join yourself to the man-befriending God. Are you wounded? Despair not. Have you fallen? Get up and say bravely: now i have begun. Fall down before your merciful master and confess your sins.
But before you say anything he will already know what you intended to say. Before you open you lips, He will see what is in your heart. You will not be able to say, "I have sinned," before you see Him stretch forth His hands to receive and embrace you.
Approach with faith and He will cleanse you straightway as He cleansed the leper, lift you from your bed as He lifted the paralytic, and raise you from the dead as He raised Lazarus.
123
I who am all covered with sores run to Thy loving-kindness. Accept my sighs as Thou didst accept the tear of the harlot.
Thou knowest, O Master, the failings of human nature. Remember that from his youth evil thoughts press diligently upon a man and be not wroth with me to the end, but open to me Thy hand and the door of Thy loving-kindness. May my recklessness not surpass Thy solicitude.
Accept, O Master, and hearken unto mine impure and unworthy supplication, Thou Who savest those who hope in Thee, Who rejectest not the prayer of sinners, Who stretchest forth Thy hand to those who have been cast to the ground. Guide me in fear of thee and give me tears of contrition.
I have lifted up the mental eyes of my soul to Thee, O Lord. Cast me not away from Thy face, for blessed is Thy name unto the ages.
124
I have incurred Thy wrath with my sins, O Lord; but it is against Thy will that Thou art wroth, for Thou overflowest with abundant mercy and Thy majesty is beyond provocation.
Thou art a sea of compassion and our errors are but a drop of tainted water. Surely one drop cannot disturb and unencompassalbe sea.
Thou dost not become anxious when Thou art displeased, and Thou art not wroth when Thou punishest. If Thou wert to become wroth when Thou punishest, the world could not withstand Thy wrath.
Thy blows are filled with love. Thy punishment burns with compassion. I accordance with Thy love, even when Thou punishest Thou strivest only for good.
The staves with which Thou punishest are carved from the wood of thy loving-kindness. No matter what Thy staff touches, the blow brings great benefit.
When a master punishes his pupil, he bats him not out of hatred, but because he wishes to bring him profit; and out of love does he meter out punishment. Thy blow also strikes from love, for Thou dost not punish out of malice. Thou, O Lord, desirest our own good, and Thou showest Thy lovinng-kindness in many ways.
It is not difficult for Thee to endure our errors, for Thou hast created our nature. Thou art not burdened by Thy creation,f or Thou knewest us before we were created.
Who will endure the hardships of caring for a baby if not the mother who bore him? Who will endure the errors of the world, if not the Lord of all?
It is easy for the Creator to endure all the difficulties wroth by His creatures, for if He had not wanted to endure these difficulties He would not have created them.
Will a woman forget her child or fail to love those who issue from her womb? But even if a woman were to forget her child, God will not forget the world He has created.
His natural compassion was moved, and He conceived and bore creation. Like a babe from his mother's womb, so did the world come forth from His will.
And lo, He gather up and carries the world, like a mother carries the fruit of her womb, feeding it with her milk.
The kindhearted father bore us and nourishes us with the blood of His Son. Thus does a mother give her child her papas to suck, in order to feed him.
A babe sucks at the breast and receives fro his mother the food that he requires. He draws out all the food he needs from his mother's paps.
A babe does not know how to turn away and search for food anywhere else than at his mother's side. Thus the world also takes life-sustaining nourishment only from Thee, O Creator; and no one but thee alone can feed it.
Sunday, April 13, 2008
A Spiritual Psalter from the works of our Holy Father Ephraim the Syrian
117
Know that there are eight evil thoughts that bring about all that is vile: those of sensuality, lechery, love of money, anger, inappropriate grief, despondency, vainglory, and pride. All these conduct warfare with every man.
If you want to conquer sensuality, cherish restraint, have fear of God--and you will conquer it.
If you want to conquer lechery, cherish wakefulness and thirst, ever contemplate death, never converse with women--and you will conquer it. If you want to conquer love of money, cherish non-acquisitiveness and frugality.
If you want to conquer anger, acquire meekness and generosity, and keep in mind how much evil the Jews did to our Lord Jesus Christ; yet He, the man-befriending god, did not become angry with them; but on the contrary He prayed for them, saying: Father, forgive them this sin, for they know not what they do.
If you want to overcome inappropriate grief, never grieve for anything that is transient. If people injure you with words or upset you or dishonor you, do not grieve; but, on the contrary, rejoice. Grieve only when you sin, and even in this case do not go to extremes, that you might not fall into despair and perish.
If you want to overcome despondency, take up some handiwork for a short while, or read, or pray frequently.
If you want to conquer vainglory, love not praise, nor honor, nor fine clothes, nor precedence, nor favor; but on the contrary, cherish occasions when you are reprimanded and dishonored, when false charges are brought against you--and reproach yourself for being more sinful than any sinner.
If you want to conquer pride, then whatever you do, say not that you do it by your own labors, or with your own strength. But if you fast or stand vigil or sleep on the bare ground or sing psalms, or serve in the altar of do a great number of prostrations, say that it was done with god's help and protection, not by your own strength and effort.
118
Praise to Him Who descended to us in human form! Praise to the Invisible One who became visible for our sake! Praise to the Eternal One Who tasted death for us! Praise to the Mysterious One Whom no mind can comprehend, and Who through His grace made Himself manifest by taking on flesh!
Blessed is He Whose good will brought Him to His mother's womb and bosom, to be born and reared! Blessed is He Who partook of death and thus granted life to mankind.
Blessed is He Who made our flesh a dwelling place for His mysterious being. Blessed is He Who declared to us His mysteries in our own tongue.
Praise to Him Who liberated us, having been bound for our sake. Glory to Him Who is plenteous in mercy, Who has redeemed us without taking anything in return. Praise to the Judge Who accepted condemnation for our sake.
Let us worship Him Who has enlightened our mind with His teaching and laid down a path for His word in our hearing. Let us give thanks to Him Who has grafted His fruit to our tree.
Praise to Him Who invisibly cultivates our spirit. Blessed is He Who attuned the senses of our spirit, that it might ever play songs of exaltation to Him on its lyre.
119
Approach the compassionate Father, O sinner, and confess your sins, saying with tears: I have sinned against heaven and before Thee, Lord God Almighty, and am no longer worhty to be called Thy son, nor even to pronounce Thy glorious name with my sinful lips, for I have made myself unworthy of heaven and earth by incurring Thy wrath, O good Master!
I beseech Thee, O Lord, cast me not aways from Thy face and turn not away from me, that I might not perish. If Thy hand had not protected men, I would have perished already; I would be like dust before the wind: it would be as if I had never appeared in the world. Indeed, from the time that I left Thy path, I have not encountered one good day, for a day spent in sin, though it may seem good, is actually the bitterest of all bitter things.
And from this day forth shall I hope on Thy mercy, that thou wilt give me strength to work our my salvation. Now do I fall down before Thee and beseech Thee: help me, who have strayed from the path of truth. Shower me with Thy compassion like the prodigal son, for i have made a shame of my life and squandered the wealth of thy grace. Have mercy on me and scorn me not, due to the depravity of my life. Have mercy on me, as Thou hadst mercy on the harlot and the publican; have compassion for me as Thou hadst compassion for the thief: on earth he was rejected by everyone, but thou didst accept him and make him an inhabitant of the sweet paradise. Accept also my repentance, for I too have been rejected by everyone. Thou, O Lord, came3st not to save the righteous, but to call sinners to repentance--accept therefore also me, who repent before Thee.
120
Grant forgiveness, O Lord; send also strength. Convert me, that I might live in sanctity, according to Thy holy will. Sanctify my heart that has become a den and dwelling-place of demons.
I am unworthy to ask forgiveness for myself, O Lord, for many times have I promised to repent and proved myself a liar by not fulfilling my promise. Thou hast picked me up many times already, but every time I freely chose to fall again.
Therefore I condemn myself and admit that I deserve all manner of punishment and torture. How many times hast thou enlightened my darkened mind; yet every time I return again to base thoughts! My whole body trembles when I contemplate this; yet every time sinful sensuality reconquers me.
How shall I recount all the gifts of Thy grace, O Lord, that I the pitiful one have received? Yet I have reduced them all to nothing by my apathy--and I continue in this manner. Thou hast bestowed upon me thousands of gifts, yet miserable me, I offer in return things repulsive to Thee.
Yet Thou, O Lord, inasmuch as Thou containest a sea of long-suffering and an abyss of kindness, do not allow me to be felled as a fruitless fig tree; and do not let be be burned without having ripened on the field of life. Snatch me not away unprepared; seize not me who have not yet lit my lamp; take not away me who have no wedding garment; but, because Thou art good and a lover of mankind, have mercy on me. Give me time to repent, and place not my soul stripped naked before Thy terrible and unwavering throne as a pitiful spectacle of infamy.
If a righteous man can barely be saved, then where will I end up, I who am lawless and sinful? If the path that leads to life is trait and narrow, then how can I be vouchsafed such good things, I who live a life of luxury, indulging in my own pleasures and dissipation? But Thou, O Lord, my Savior, Son of the true God, as Thou knowest and desirest, by Thy grace alone, freely turn me away from the sin that abides in me and save me from ruin.
Know that there are eight evil thoughts that bring about all that is vile: those of sensuality, lechery, love of money, anger, inappropriate grief, despondency, vainglory, and pride. All these conduct warfare with every man.
If you want to conquer sensuality, cherish restraint, have fear of God--and you will conquer it.
If you want to conquer lechery, cherish wakefulness and thirst, ever contemplate death, never converse with women--and you will conquer it. If you want to conquer love of money, cherish non-acquisitiveness and frugality.
If you want to conquer anger, acquire meekness and generosity, and keep in mind how much evil the Jews did to our Lord Jesus Christ; yet He, the man-befriending god, did not become angry with them; but on the contrary He prayed for them, saying: Father, forgive them this sin, for they know not what they do.
If you want to overcome inappropriate grief, never grieve for anything that is transient. If people injure you with words or upset you or dishonor you, do not grieve; but, on the contrary, rejoice. Grieve only when you sin, and even in this case do not go to extremes, that you might not fall into despair and perish.
If you want to overcome despondency, take up some handiwork for a short while, or read, or pray frequently.
If you want to conquer vainglory, love not praise, nor honor, nor fine clothes, nor precedence, nor favor; but on the contrary, cherish occasions when you are reprimanded and dishonored, when false charges are brought against you--and reproach yourself for being more sinful than any sinner.
If you want to conquer pride, then whatever you do, say not that you do it by your own labors, or with your own strength. But if you fast or stand vigil or sleep on the bare ground or sing psalms, or serve in the altar of do a great number of prostrations, say that it was done with god's help and protection, not by your own strength and effort.
118
Praise to Him Who descended to us in human form! Praise to the Invisible One who became visible for our sake! Praise to the Eternal One Who tasted death for us! Praise to the Mysterious One Whom no mind can comprehend, and Who through His grace made Himself manifest by taking on flesh!
Blessed is He Whose good will brought Him to His mother's womb and bosom, to be born and reared! Blessed is He Who partook of death and thus granted life to mankind.
Blessed is He Who made our flesh a dwelling place for His mysterious being. Blessed is He Who declared to us His mysteries in our own tongue.
Praise to Him Who liberated us, having been bound for our sake. Glory to Him Who is plenteous in mercy, Who has redeemed us without taking anything in return. Praise to the Judge Who accepted condemnation for our sake.
Let us worship Him Who has enlightened our mind with His teaching and laid down a path for His word in our hearing. Let us give thanks to Him Who has grafted His fruit to our tree.
Praise to Him Who invisibly cultivates our spirit. Blessed is He Who attuned the senses of our spirit, that it might ever play songs of exaltation to Him on its lyre.
119
Approach the compassionate Father, O sinner, and confess your sins, saying with tears: I have sinned against heaven and before Thee, Lord God Almighty, and am no longer worhty to be called Thy son, nor even to pronounce Thy glorious name with my sinful lips, for I have made myself unworthy of heaven and earth by incurring Thy wrath, O good Master!
I beseech Thee, O Lord, cast me not aways from Thy face and turn not away from me, that I might not perish. If Thy hand had not protected men, I would have perished already; I would be like dust before the wind: it would be as if I had never appeared in the world. Indeed, from the time that I left Thy path, I have not encountered one good day, for a day spent in sin, though it may seem good, is actually the bitterest of all bitter things.
And from this day forth shall I hope on Thy mercy, that thou wilt give me strength to work our my salvation. Now do I fall down before Thee and beseech Thee: help me, who have strayed from the path of truth. Shower me with Thy compassion like the prodigal son, for i have made a shame of my life and squandered the wealth of thy grace. Have mercy on me and scorn me not, due to the depravity of my life. Have mercy on me, as Thou hadst mercy on the harlot and the publican; have compassion for me as Thou hadst compassion for the thief: on earth he was rejected by everyone, but thou didst accept him and make him an inhabitant of the sweet paradise. Accept also my repentance, for I too have been rejected by everyone. Thou, O Lord, came3st not to save the righteous, but to call sinners to repentance--accept therefore also me, who repent before Thee.
120
Grant forgiveness, O Lord; send also strength. Convert me, that I might live in sanctity, according to Thy holy will. Sanctify my heart that has become a den and dwelling-place of demons.
I am unworthy to ask forgiveness for myself, O Lord, for many times have I promised to repent and proved myself a liar by not fulfilling my promise. Thou hast picked me up many times already, but every time I freely chose to fall again.
Therefore I condemn myself and admit that I deserve all manner of punishment and torture. How many times hast thou enlightened my darkened mind; yet every time I return again to base thoughts! My whole body trembles when I contemplate this; yet every time sinful sensuality reconquers me.
How shall I recount all the gifts of Thy grace, O Lord, that I the pitiful one have received? Yet I have reduced them all to nothing by my apathy--and I continue in this manner. Thou hast bestowed upon me thousands of gifts, yet miserable me, I offer in return things repulsive to Thee.
Yet Thou, O Lord, inasmuch as Thou containest a sea of long-suffering and an abyss of kindness, do not allow me to be felled as a fruitless fig tree; and do not let be be burned without having ripened on the field of life. Snatch me not away unprepared; seize not me who have not yet lit my lamp; take not away me who have no wedding garment; but, because Thou art good and a lover of mankind, have mercy on me. Give me time to repent, and place not my soul stripped naked before Thy terrible and unwavering throne as a pitiful spectacle of infamy.
If a righteous man can barely be saved, then where will I end up, I who am lawless and sinful? If the path that leads to life is trait and narrow, then how can I be vouchsafed such good things, I who live a life of luxury, indulging in my own pleasures and dissipation? But Thou, O Lord, my Savior, Son of the true God, as Thou knowest and desirest, by Thy grace alone, freely turn me away from the sin that abides in me and save me from ruin.
Saturday, April 12, 2008
A Spiritual Psalter from the works of our Holy Father Ephraim the Syrian
113
Daily do I provoke Thy long-suffering patience, O Master. Before mine eyes are both my wretchedness and Thy loving-kindness.
Because I am in the power of the unclean enemy who ever oppresses me, day and night shall I call upon Thy loving-kindness with tears, that Thou mightest deliver me from his attacks. For who can withstand the Evil One, if Thy grace withdraws from him even for one minute, O Master?
Hour after hour does the enemy oppress my soul with both words and deeds. May thy power, O Christ, that rebuked the waves of the sea, rebuke him also, that he may have no power over me, Thy servant. For daily does he renew his wicked scheming against me, and rush to seize my mind, drawing it away from the sweetness of Thy Divine commandments and the saving teachings they contain. Quickly send Thy grace, O Master, to drive the great serpent and all his defiled and wicked thoughts away from Thy servant.
The offended widow approaches the heartless and unjust judge, that he might defend her from her adversary; but I approach my kindhearted Master Who is long-sufffering and good, Who has in His power heaven and earth, that He might be quick to hear me. Thou Who offerest Thy defense to all who hope upon Thee day and night, neither tarry in defending me, O Master. Snatch me away from the enemy and direct my path to Thee that, having conquered the enemy by Thy grace, I might bless Thee, Who are kindhearted and long-suffering, and glorify Thee Who alone desirest the salvation of all men.
114
the good God grants us the enlightenment of knowledge, and His grace ever visits our hearts. If she finds peace there, she enters and dwells constantly in the soul. But if she does not find the heart pure, she immediately withdraws. Yet compassion encourages her to descend anew and visit us sinners, for we are all inconstant because of our fee will, but not by nature.
We are always distracted and weak, envious and wicked; often do we think evil of one another; we occupy ourselves with wicked ideas, and are always plunged in a mire of unclean thoughts. Thus when grace comes to visit us and encounters in our hearts the stench of unclean thoughts, she immediately withdraws without seeking an entrance, that she might make her habitation there and dwell is us, as is pleasing to her. She leaves only a trace of her radiant sweetness ion the heart, so that one might recognize that grace has visited him but not found an entrance, and, having delighted in grace's radiance, might seek her out.
Do you see God's Providence? Do you see Christ's loving-kindness? Do you see how god Who is Holy ever loves us and wants us to be saved? Blessed is the man who ever strives to prepare a pure heart for grace, that when she comes she might find the fragrance of virtues and a sacred place in the soul and reside therein unto the ages of ages.
115
Up till now and in this very day, with my face ashamed and hung low do I dare to speak to thee, O master of the angels and Creator of all things--I, who am earth and dust, a distance to men and an insult to mankind; I, who am condemned, all covered with wounds and filled with despondency. How shall I lift my gaze to meet Thy grace, O Master? How shall I find the boldness to move my impure, polluted tongue? How shall I begin my confession?
I who am wretched have immeasurably offended Thy name and lived wantonly, more so than the prodigal son. In my person have I defiled and injured Thine image, for I have not heeded Thy commandments.
I know, O Lord, that because of the multitude of my spiritual stains and my impurity I am not worthy to bear Thy holy name; I cannot stand before Thee in prayer; I cannot look up and behold the heights of heaven, for I have opened the door to reprehensible desire and surrendered to unseemly impulses; and thus have I defiled my poor soul with passions and blackened my soul's garment with the immorality of my will. My whole mind is filled with demonic thoughts. By all my deeds and thoughts have I distressed Thy grace, and I continue repeatedly to do so. Yet ever do I please and gratify my enemy who wages war against me.
My conscience exposes my mind's error; in my heart I cover my face with shame. Before the judgement that awaits me I condemn myself.
Triumphantly do the wanton habits that never leave me drag me along. Ever do I soil myself in the mire of sensuality. I am every entangled in defiled thoughts; from my youth have I become a vessel of corrupting sin. And to this day, though I daily hear of the judgement and of the just deserts to be meted out, I have no will to oppose carnal lust. Ceaselessly do I submit myself to pitfalls; ceaselessly do i make myself a prisoner.
Woe is me, O Lord; dreadfully have I squandered Thy long-suffering patience! Woe is me; how many years have I spent offending Thy Holy Spirit! Woe is me; the time of my life has been spent in all manner of vain endeavors!...But, O Lord, do Thou not expose me in Thy fury; do Thou not exhibit my hateful, disgraceful deeds in a place of universal shame before all angels and men, to my dishonor and eternal condemnation, although I do indeed merit every dishonor and condemnation. According to Thy great compassion alone, have mercy on me and cleanse all my sins before the judgement.
116
I reflected upon the day my life will end--and I groaned when I saw the multitude of my transgressions and the heaviness of mine iniquities, and when I considered how my errors will be revealed for all to see. There, there will be no place for repentance, tears and prayers; instead, everyone will receive his reward according to his labors, recompense according to his deeds; and neither weeping nor suffering will incline the just Judge to mercy. Show me Thy kind mercy, O Lover of mankind!
In the day when the graves of the dead are opened, the trumpet will sound. Its voice will thunder, great trembling and awe will embrace the universe, all the angels will descend on Thy command to separate the good from the bad, clouds of fire will appear and carry off the pure bodies of the saints. In that day, may Thy compassion be shown also to me, that I might stand at Thy right hand, O good Lord, and obtain mercy!
In m thoughts I descended into the graves to see our corruption,k and when I had examined what Lay therein I cried: Turn not away from Thy servant, O Lord! Resurrect me who am perishing, and I will praise Thy dominion; overthrow the Evil One who rejoiced over me in the my day of sorrow and have mercy on me, for I have hoped in Thee.
In the end a merciless judgement awaits those who have sinned and not repented of their wicked deeds. But those who have acted righteously and kept the commandments of their Lord shall receive from Him the good things of heaven and inherit eternal life. There shall the righteous rejoice over their labors; the saints shall delight in the rewards they will receive.
Lodge all of us in Thy bridal chamber, O Lord, Who art kindhearted toward sinners!
Daily do I provoke Thy long-suffering patience, O Master. Before mine eyes are both my wretchedness and Thy loving-kindness.
Because I am in the power of the unclean enemy who ever oppresses me, day and night shall I call upon Thy loving-kindness with tears, that Thou mightest deliver me from his attacks. For who can withstand the Evil One, if Thy grace withdraws from him even for one minute, O Master?
Hour after hour does the enemy oppress my soul with both words and deeds. May thy power, O Christ, that rebuked the waves of the sea, rebuke him also, that he may have no power over me, Thy servant. For daily does he renew his wicked scheming against me, and rush to seize my mind, drawing it away from the sweetness of Thy Divine commandments and the saving teachings they contain. Quickly send Thy grace, O Master, to drive the great serpent and all his defiled and wicked thoughts away from Thy servant.
The offended widow approaches the heartless and unjust judge, that he might defend her from her adversary; but I approach my kindhearted Master Who is long-sufffering and good, Who has in His power heaven and earth, that He might be quick to hear me. Thou Who offerest Thy defense to all who hope upon Thee day and night, neither tarry in defending me, O Master. Snatch me away from the enemy and direct my path to Thee that, having conquered the enemy by Thy grace, I might bless Thee, Who are kindhearted and long-suffering, and glorify Thee Who alone desirest the salvation of all men.
114
the good God grants us the enlightenment of knowledge, and His grace ever visits our hearts. If she finds peace there, she enters and dwells constantly in the soul. But if she does not find the heart pure, she immediately withdraws. Yet compassion encourages her to descend anew and visit us sinners, for we are all inconstant because of our fee will, but not by nature.
We are always distracted and weak, envious and wicked; often do we think evil of one another; we occupy ourselves with wicked ideas, and are always plunged in a mire of unclean thoughts. Thus when grace comes to visit us and encounters in our hearts the stench of unclean thoughts, she immediately withdraws without seeking an entrance, that she might make her habitation there and dwell is us, as is pleasing to her. She leaves only a trace of her radiant sweetness ion the heart, so that one might recognize that grace has visited him but not found an entrance, and, having delighted in grace's radiance, might seek her out.
Do you see God's Providence? Do you see Christ's loving-kindness? Do you see how god Who is Holy ever loves us and wants us to be saved? Blessed is the man who ever strives to prepare a pure heart for grace, that when she comes she might find the fragrance of virtues and a sacred place in the soul and reside therein unto the ages of ages.
115
Up till now and in this very day, with my face ashamed and hung low do I dare to speak to thee, O master of the angels and Creator of all things--I, who am earth and dust, a distance to men and an insult to mankind; I, who am condemned, all covered with wounds and filled with despondency. How shall I lift my gaze to meet Thy grace, O Master? How shall I find the boldness to move my impure, polluted tongue? How shall I begin my confession?
I who am wretched have immeasurably offended Thy name and lived wantonly, more so than the prodigal son. In my person have I defiled and injured Thine image, for I have not heeded Thy commandments.
I know, O Lord, that because of the multitude of my spiritual stains and my impurity I am not worthy to bear Thy holy name; I cannot stand before Thee in prayer; I cannot look up and behold the heights of heaven, for I have opened the door to reprehensible desire and surrendered to unseemly impulses; and thus have I defiled my poor soul with passions and blackened my soul's garment with the immorality of my will. My whole mind is filled with demonic thoughts. By all my deeds and thoughts have I distressed Thy grace, and I continue repeatedly to do so. Yet ever do I please and gratify my enemy who wages war against me.
My conscience exposes my mind's error; in my heart I cover my face with shame. Before the judgement that awaits me I condemn myself.
Triumphantly do the wanton habits that never leave me drag me along. Ever do I soil myself in the mire of sensuality. I am every entangled in defiled thoughts; from my youth have I become a vessel of corrupting sin. And to this day, though I daily hear of the judgement and of the just deserts to be meted out, I have no will to oppose carnal lust. Ceaselessly do I submit myself to pitfalls; ceaselessly do i make myself a prisoner.
Woe is me, O Lord; dreadfully have I squandered Thy long-suffering patience! Woe is me; how many years have I spent offending Thy Holy Spirit! Woe is me; the time of my life has been spent in all manner of vain endeavors!...But, O Lord, do Thou not expose me in Thy fury; do Thou not exhibit my hateful, disgraceful deeds in a place of universal shame before all angels and men, to my dishonor and eternal condemnation, although I do indeed merit every dishonor and condemnation. According to Thy great compassion alone, have mercy on me and cleanse all my sins before the judgement.
116
I reflected upon the day my life will end--and I groaned when I saw the multitude of my transgressions and the heaviness of mine iniquities, and when I considered how my errors will be revealed for all to see. There, there will be no place for repentance, tears and prayers; instead, everyone will receive his reward according to his labors, recompense according to his deeds; and neither weeping nor suffering will incline the just Judge to mercy. Show me Thy kind mercy, O Lover of mankind!
In the day when the graves of the dead are opened, the trumpet will sound. Its voice will thunder, great trembling and awe will embrace the universe, all the angels will descend on Thy command to separate the good from the bad, clouds of fire will appear and carry off the pure bodies of the saints. In that day, may Thy compassion be shown also to me, that I might stand at Thy right hand, O good Lord, and obtain mercy!
In m thoughts I descended into the graves to see our corruption,k and when I had examined what Lay therein I cried: Turn not away from Thy servant, O Lord! Resurrect me who am perishing, and I will praise Thy dominion; overthrow the Evil One who rejoiced over me in the my day of sorrow and have mercy on me, for I have hoped in Thee.
In the end a merciless judgement awaits those who have sinned and not repented of their wicked deeds. But those who have acted righteously and kept the commandments of their Lord shall receive from Him the good things of heaven and inherit eternal life. There shall the righteous rejoice over their labors; the saints shall delight in the rewards they will receive.
Lodge all of us in Thy bridal chamber, O Lord, Who art kindhearted toward sinners!
Thursday, April 10, 2008
A Spiritual Psalter from the works of our Holy Father Ephraim the Syrian
109
The holy Fathers, who loved God and become accomplished in sufferings and temptations, received from the Heaven King imperishable crowns with glory and praise.
But I, who am miserable, sin without any temptation; I irritate and embitter my Master.
However, having learned through experience of Thy vast and unutterable compassion, O Lord, I beseech the greatness of Thy grace. Save me and grant Thy servant his heart's request, from the treasures of Thy loving-kindness, that Thy grace might ceaselessly stream forth in my heart and lips like a river; that my heart might, through Thy grace, become a pure and undefiled temple that receives in itself the heavenly King; that the finger of grace might set my tongue perpetually in motion, like the string of a lyre, to the service of Thy glory, O Lover of mankind; and that I may ceaselessly, throughout the days of my life, glorify and bless Thee with love with both heart and lips.
O Christ the Savior! Grant me my heart's request, that my tongue might become like unto a sweet-sounding flute; that by comforting, enlightening and educating others I might pay off a small portion of my great debt and, protected by Thy mercy, I might be saved when every soul is set trembling before Thy terrifying glory.
Verily, O Master, only-begotten Son of God, hearken unto me and accept the petition of Thy servant as an offering. I, a sinner, am saved by Thy grace. to Thee Who savest a sinner by Thy compassion, is due all glory unto the ages.
110
A trumpet will sound from the heavens, saying: Awake, ye beloved of Christ. Lo, the heavenly King has come to give you repose and joy in eternal life in return for your ascetic labors. Awake and behold Christ the King, the immortal Bridegroom, whom you have loved. Behold His kingdom that He has prepared for you. Come and rejoice together with Him in inexpressible joy.
And those righteous and worthy of God shall soar high in the air in unutterable glory, and all the lawless will remain below with great shame. Those who have labored here shall receive bliss and joy; all the sinners shall receive shame and chastisement.
Blessed is he who has labored here to render himself worthy in that hour, and pitiful is he who has made himself unworthy in that hour. the clouds will gather all the saints from the earth and carry them to heaven, but angels will snatch away the lawless and cast them into the oven that burns with unquenchable fire.
Who shall give my head abundant waters and my eyes a fountain ever gushing tears, that I might weep for myself day and night, entreating God that I might not be found unworthy in the hour of His coming, and not hear from my Master the terrible sentence: go away from Me, O worker of iniquity; I know not from whence thou art.
O God on high, only Immortal One! Show this sinner Thy great compassion in that hour, that my hidden deceit might not be made known to the witnesses there: the angels, archangels, prophets, apostles, righteous and saints. Save this lawless one by Thy grace and compassion, and lead him into the sweet paradise together with the righteous who are perfect. Accept the supplication of thy servant, according to the prayers of the saints who have been pleasing to Thee!
111
O Mother of God, who surpassest every mind and word! O virgin who exceedest all earthly virginity, for even before the Divine birth wast thou a Virgin beyond all virgins--and such didst thou remain both during and after the birth!
Thee, O Lady do I beg, thee do I entreat, O merciful and man-befriending Mother of the merciful and man-befriending God: defend me at this hour if ever thous wilt do so, for now am I most in need of thy protection and thy help.
I am all a mire of filth and sin, a dwelling place of soul-corrupting passions. Yet I intend to approach the all-pure and terrifying Mysteries of thy Son and God, and therefore do I suffer fear, and trembling embraces me because of the unbearable multitude of my sins.
but if ever I am to remain without communion on the pretext of my unworthiness, then shall I fall into a great abyss of evil and bring upon myself great chastisement. I anguish over both the first alternative and the second.
to thee do I run; be kind to me, my all-pure Lady. Take advantage of thy motherly boldness before thy Son and god, and gain for me forgiveness of my former sins. Vouchsafe me to be made pure and enlightened by communion of the Mysteries, and show me how to spend the remainder of my life in repentance, purity and humility. Remain always with me in my thoughts, words and deeds, in all the movements of my soul and body, instructing me, leading me and guiding me, deflecting from em all hostile powers, and preserving me and providing thy servant, however worthless, with thy grace in every way.
112
O Giver of all good things, O fountain of healing and treasure of compassion, Thou only good and kindhearted God, Who ever grantest good things to those who ask! I beseech Thee, that thine abundant grace might descend upon me and gather together my mind and heal my hidden sores anew, for distractions and wandering thoughts constantly renew my secret sores.
O long-suffering Lord Who ever curest with grace and compassion, heal the great spiritual infirmities that are within me, a sinner!
I have nothing to give Thee, O Master, in return for Thy cures. And what price could be put on Thy cures? neither heaven nor earth can give a reward worthy of them. It is impossible to purchase these holy heavenly cures, for they are priceless. Thous givest them only in return for tears, O our Savior; and in return for bitter weeping dost Thou grant them to all.
O my Master, grant me who am unworthy daily tears and strength, that my heart, enraptured and streaming forth fountains of tears, might be ceaselessly illuminated by pure prayer, and that a few tears might blot out the weighty record of my sins, and a small measure of weeping might extinguish the fire that burns therein. For if I weep here, there will I be delivered from the inextinguishable fire.
The holy Fathers, who loved God and become accomplished in sufferings and temptations, received from the Heaven King imperishable crowns with glory and praise.
But I, who am miserable, sin without any temptation; I irritate and embitter my Master.
However, having learned through experience of Thy vast and unutterable compassion, O Lord, I beseech the greatness of Thy grace. Save me and grant Thy servant his heart's request, from the treasures of Thy loving-kindness, that Thy grace might ceaselessly stream forth in my heart and lips like a river; that my heart might, through Thy grace, become a pure and undefiled temple that receives in itself the heavenly King; that the finger of grace might set my tongue perpetually in motion, like the string of a lyre, to the service of Thy glory, O Lover of mankind; and that I may ceaselessly, throughout the days of my life, glorify and bless Thee with love with both heart and lips.
O Christ the Savior! Grant me my heart's request, that my tongue might become like unto a sweet-sounding flute; that by comforting, enlightening and educating others I might pay off a small portion of my great debt and, protected by Thy mercy, I might be saved when every soul is set trembling before Thy terrifying glory.
Verily, O Master, only-begotten Son of God, hearken unto me and accept the petition of Thy servant as an offering. I, a sinner, am saved by Thy grace. to Thee Who savest a sinner by Thy compassion, is due all glory unto the ages.
110
A trumpet will sound from the heavens, saying: Awake, ye beloved of Christ. Lo, the heavenly King has come to give you repose and joy in eternal life in return for your ascetic labors. Awake and behold Christ the King, the immortal Bridegroom, whom you have loved. Behold His kingdom that He has prepared for you. Come and rejoice together with Him in inexpressible joy.
And those righteous and worthy of God shall soar high in the air in unutterable glory, and all the lawless will remain below with great shame. Those who have labored here shall receive bliss and joy; all the sinners shall receive shame and chastisement.
Blessed is he who has labored here to render himself worthy in that hour, and pitiful is he who has made himself unworthy in that hour. the clouds will gather all the saints from the earth and carry them to heaven, but angels will snatch away the lawless and cast them into the oven that burns with unquenchable fire.
Who shall give my head abundant waters and my eyes a fountain ever gushing tears, that I might weep for myself day and night, entreating God that I might not be found unworthy in the hour of His coming, and not hear from my Master the terrible sentence: go away from Me, O worker of iniquity; I know not from whence thou art.
O God on high, only Immortal One! Show this sinner Thy great compassion in that hour, that my hidden deceit might not be made known to the witnesses there: the angels, archangels, prophets, apostles, righteous and saints. Save this lawless one by Thy grace and compassion, and lead him into the sweet paradise together with the righteous who are perfect. Accept the supplication of thy servant, according to the prayers of the saints who have been pleasing to Thee!
111
O Mother of God, who surpassest every mind and word! O virgin who exceedest all earthly virginity, for even before the Divine birth wast thou a Virgin beyond all virgins--and such didst thou remain both during and after the birth!
Thee, O Lady do I beg, thee do I entreat, O merciful and man-befriending Mother of the merciful and man-befriending God: defend me at this hour if ever thous wilt do so, for now am I most in need of thy protection and thy help.
I am all a mire of filth and sin, a dwelling place of soul-corrupting passions. Yet I intend to approach the all-pure and terrifying Mysteries of thy Son and God, and therefore do I suffer fear, and trembling embraces me because of the unbearable multitude of my sins.
but if ever I am to remain without communion on the pretext of my unworthiness, then shall I fall into a great abyss of evil and bring upon myself great chastisement. I anguish over both the first alternative and the second.
to thee do I run; be kind to me, my all-pure Lady. Take advantage of thy motherly boldness before thy Son and god, and gain for me forgiveness of my former sins. Vouchsafe me to be made pure and enlightened by communion of the Mysteries, and show me how to spend the remainder of my life in repentance, purity and humility. Remain always with me in my thoughts, words and deeds, in all the movements of my soul and body, instructing me, leading me and guiding me, deflecting from em all hostile powers, and preserving me and providing thy servant, however worthless, with thy grace in every way.
112
O Giver of all good things, O fountain of healing and treasure of compassion, Thou only good and kindhearted God, Who ever grantest good things to those who ask! I beseech Thee, that thine abundant grace might descend upon me and gather together my mind and heal my hidden sores anew, for distractions and wandering thoughts constantly renew my secret sores.
O long-suffering Lord Who ever curest with grace and compassion, heal the great spiritual infirmities that are within me, a sinner!
I have nothing to give Thee, O Master, in return for Thy cures. And what price could be put on Thy cures? neither heaven nor earth can give a reward worthy of them. It is impossible to purchase these holy heavenly cures, for they are priceless. Thous givest them only in return for tears, O our Savior; and in return for bitter weeping dost Thou grant them to all.
O my Master, grant me who am unworthy daily tears and strength, that my heart, enraptured and streaming forth fountains of tears, might be ceaselessly illuminated by pure prayer, and that a few tears might blot out the weighty record of my sins, and a small measure of weeping might extinguish the fire that burns therein. For if I weep here, there will I be delivered from the inextinguishable fire.
Wednesday, April 09, 2008
A Spiritual Psalter from the works of our Holy Father Ephraim the Syrian
105
I entreat the Mother of God: O Birthgiver of the never-setting Light, hear the words that I proclaim before thee!
I who am miserable wallow in mire; I am all covered with impurities, completely blackened. Even the earth have I defiled with the multitude of my sins, O my Lady. And thus, with sighs does she cry out on my behalf to the incorruptible Judge, calling forth both heaven with its stars and the sun as witnesses.
And already the storm of my thoughts plunges me into despair....I, a prodigal, have laid all my hope upon thee, O Mother of God. Thou alone, who didst bear the Deliverer of the world in thy womb, loosen my unloosenable bonds. Whiten thou me, who am blackened and have been turned into darkness, with tears of repentance. Thou, who hast given birth to my life, raise up me who am slain by my carelessness, and lead me who have become alienated from God and the angels back to them, O Mother of God!
Awesome indeed is the miracle! How the Lord has tolerated my sins! How is it that He has not conveyed me who am miserable to the depths of hell while still alive! How is it that He has not sent from on high His invisible staff or His sword to strike me down....Without a doubt, thou, O Lady, hast granted me life by thine intercessions. Thou seekest my repentance--O All-good virgin give it to me, Thy servant--for thou art my wall, my harbor and my rampart.
106
Our Lord Jesus, O venerable King, Who by Thy suffering hast vanquished death the torturer; O Son of God Who hast promised us new life and the heavenly kingdom: removed from us all harm, that Thy grace might dwell in us, so that in the day of Thy coming we might come out to meet Thee in accordance with Thy good will, that we might behold Thee and stand before Thee with you.
Blot out our sins with Thy forgiveness, that we might praise Thy name because of Thine acts of kindness. Vouchsafe all of us, O Lord, according to Thy grace to glorify and worship Thy Divinity.
May the eyes that here have seen Thy glory there behold Thy great mercy. May the ears that here have heard the sound of thy words hear there also the sounds of rejoicing. May the lips that here have glorified Thee in Thy churches be vouchsafed there also to sing praise to Thee. May the tongue that here has cried "Holy, holy, holy" there also be turned to praise Thee. May the hands that have held Thy flesh and blood receive from Thee pardon from debts. May the feet that have entered the holy temple there also walk about the dominion of life.
Send our congregation, our brotherhood that worships Thy Divinity, the entire fullness of Thy saving gifts. May Thy supreme love remain with us, and may it make us worthy to offer thee due praise.
Open Thy door to our prayer, and may our service be pleasing to Thee.
Turn to us, O Good One,k according to Thy compassion; and drive away from us all harm, that we might ceaselessly praise Thee, O Lord, and Thy Father and the Holy Spirit.
107
Cast not aside my supplication, O good Lord! Unworthy lips cry out to Thee, together with an impure heart and a soul defiled by sins.
Hearken unto me, O Lord, according to Thy goodness. Confirm my heart in fear of Thee. Set my feet on the rock of repentance. May Thy goodness, O Lord, vanquish my sinfulness. May the light of Thy grace overcome the darkness that is in me.
Thou, O Lord, Who didst open the eyes of the blind man, open the darkened eyes of my heart. Thou Who didst cleanse lepers with Thy word, cleanse the stains of my soul. May Thy grace, O Lord, be a fire in me, consuming my impure thoughts.
Thou alone art good. Thou art the Light that surpasses all light. Thou art the joy that surpasses all joy. Thou art the Peace that surpasses all peace. Thou art the true Life. Thou art the Salvation that endures unto the ages.
I, who am deserving of every punishment, who merit every kind of torture, fall down before Thee, O Good One, with my supplication. I beseech Thee, O Redeemer, let not the adversary seize me in the end.
But do Thou, O good and merciful Lord, raise up my members paralyzed by sin; enliven my soul slain by iniquity, enlighten my heart clouded by wicked lust, deliver me from every evil deed; implant in me Thy perfect love, O Lord Jesus Christ, Savior of the world; and write the name of Thy servant in the book of life; grant me a good end, that, having secured victory over the devil, I might bow down unashamed with all the righteous before the throne of Thy kingdom.
108
Woe is me, O soul, for thou dost remain senseless in the present life, daily indulging in selfish pleasures and comforts and leading a dissolute life. In the age to come thou shalt cry like the rich man; thou shalt be tormented int he flames of eternal fire.
Woe is me, O soul, that thou canst not endure any sorrows inflicted by thy brother, nor even a word of insult; rather, thou art quick to contradict and oppose others. For this thou shalt lose the crown of patience and meekness and wilt be judge with those who begrudge others.
Woe is me, O soul, for thous hatest and revilest thy brother and dost allow others to do the same. For this thou shalt be punished with the murderers, for he who hates his brother is a murderer.
Woe is me, O soul, that thou dost scorn God's commandments and presume that salvation comes wit the label "Christian"' for on that terrible day thou shalt hear the Lord say: Not everyone who says to Me, "Lord, Lord," shall enter the kingdom.
Woe is me, O soul, for thou dost love the glory of men, honor, luxurious garments, and material acquisitions. For this in the day of judgement thou shalt be an abomination before God; thou shalt be cast away from His face and numbered withe the arrogant demons.
Woe is me, O soul, for thou dost sin daily, yet day after day dost thou postpone repentance. Death will overtake thee suddenly, like a thief in the night, and thou wilt be led away in bonds to gehenna, shedding tears and denouncing thy folly in vain.
Woe is me, O soul, that thou dost tremble not, thinking about the terrible day of judgement, when all the powers of heaven shall be moved with fear, and about how thou shalt appear before the face of God wearing a robe of shame and defilement.
I entreat the Mother of God: O Birthgiver of the never-setting Light, hear the words that I proclaim before thee!
I who am miserable wallow in mire; I am all covered with impurities, completely blackened. Even the earth have I defiled with the multitude of my sins, O my Lady. And thus, with sighs does she cry out on my behalf to the incorruptible Judge, calling forth both heaven with its stars and the sun as witnesses.
And already the storm of my thoughts plunges me into despair....I, a prodigal, have laid all my hope upon thee, O Mother of God. Thou alone, who didst bear the Deliverer of the world in thy womb, loosen my unloosenable bonds. Whiten thou me, who am blackened and have been turned into darkness, with tears of repentance. Thou, who hast given birth to my life, raise up me who am slain by my carelessness, and lead me who have become alienated from God and the angels back to them, O Mother of God!
Awesome indeed is the miracle! How the Lord has tolerated my sins! How is it that He has not conveyed me who am miserable to the depths of hell while still alive! How is it that He has not sent from on high His invisible staff or His sword to strike me down....Without a doubt, thou, O Lady, hast granted me life by thine intercessions. Thou seekest my repentance--O All-good virgin give it to me, Thy servant--for thou art my wall, my harbor and my rampart.
106
Our Lord Jesus, O venerable King, Who by Thy suffering hast vanquished death the torturer; O Son of God Who hast promised us new life and the heavenly kingdom: removed from us all harm, that Thy grace might dwell in us, so that in the day of Thy coming we might come out to meet Thee in accordance with Thy good will, that we might behold Thee and stand before Thee with you.
Blot out our sins with Thy forgiveness, that we might praise Thy name because of Thine acts of kindness. Vouchsafe all of us, O Lord, according to Thy grace to glorify and worship Thy Divinity.
May the eyes that here have seen Thy glory there behold Thy great mercy. May the ears that here have heard the sound of thy words hear there also the sounds of rejoicing. May the lips that here have glorified Thee in Thy churches be vouchsafed there also to sing praise to Thee. May the tongue that here has cried "Holy, holy, holy" there also be turned to praise Thee. May the hands that have held Thy flesh and blood receive from Thee pardon from debts. May the feet that have entered the holy temple there also walk about the dominion of life.
Send our congregation, our brotherhood that worships Thy Divinity, the entire fullness of Thy saving gifts. May Thy supreme love remain with us, and may it make us worthy to offer thee due praise.
Open Thy door to our prayer, and may our service be pleasing to Thee.
Turn to us, O Good One,k according to Thy compassion; and drive away from us all harm, that we might ceaselessly praise Thee, O Lord, and Thy Father and the Holy Spirit.
107
Cast not aside my supplication, O good Lord! Unworthy lips cry out to Thee, together with an impure heart and a soul defiled by sins.
Hearken unto me, O Lord, according to Thy goodness. Confirm my heart in fear of Thee. Set my feet on the rock of repentance. May Thy goodness, O Lord, vanquish my sinfulness. May the light of Thy grace overcome the darkness that is in me.
Thou, O Lord, Who didst open the eyes of the blind man, open the darkened eyes of my heart. Thou Who didst cleanse lepers with Thy word, cleanse the stains of my soul. May Thy grace, O Lord, be a fire in me, consuming my impure thoughts.
Thou alone art good. Thou art the Light that surpasses all light. Thou art the joy that surpasses all joy. Thou art the Peace that surpasses all peace. Thou art the true Life. Thou art the Salvation that endures unto the ages.
I, who am deserving of every punishment, who merit every kind of torture, fall down before Thee, O Good One, with my supplication. I beseech Thee, O Redeemer, let not the adversary seize me in the end.
But do Thou, O good and merciful Lord, raise up my members paralyzed by sin; enliven my soul slain by iniquity, enlighten my heart clouded by wicked lust, deliver me from every evil deed; implant in me Thy perfect love, O Lord Jesus Christ, Savior of the world; and write the name of Thy servant in the book of life; grant me a good end, that, having secured victory over the devil, I might bow down unashamed with all the righteous before the throne of Thy kingdom.
108
Woe is me, O soul, for thou dost remain senseless in the present life, daily indulging in selfish pleasures and comforts and leading a dissolute life. In the age to come thou shalt cry like the rich man; thou shalt be tormented int he flames of eternal fire.
Woe is me, O soul, that thou canst not endure any sorrows inflicted by thy brother, nor even a word of insult; rather, thou art quick to contradict and oppose others. For this thou shalt lose the crown of patience and meekness and wilt be judge with those who begrudge others.
Woe is me, O soul, for thous hatest and revilest thy brother and dost allow others to do the same. For this thou shalt be punished with the murderers, for he who hates his brother is a murderer.
Woe is me, O soul, that thou dost scorn God's commandments and presume that salvation comes wit the label "Christian"' for on that terrible day thou shalt hear the Lord say: Not everyone who says to Me, "Lord, Lord," shall enter the kingdom.
Woe is me, O soul, for thou dost love the glory of men, honor, luxurious garments, and material acquisitions. For this in the day of judgement thou shalt be an abomination before God; thou shalt be cast away from His face and numbered withe the arrogant demons.
Woe is me, O soul, for thou dost sin daily, yet day after day dost thou postpone repentance. Death will overtake thee suddenly, like a thief in the night, and thou wilt be led away in bonds to gehenna, shedding tears and denouncing thy folly in vain.
Woe is me, O soul, that thou dost tremble not, thinking about the terrible day of judgement, when all the powers of heaven shall be moved with fear, and about how thou shalt appear before the face of God wearing a robe of shame and defilement.
Tuesday, April 08, 2008
A Spiritual Psalter from the works of our Holy Father Ephraim the Syrian
101
Blessed is he who in the Lord has become free of all the affairs of this vain life.
Blessed is he who has in mind the coming terrible judgement and tries to heal the wounds of his soul with tears.
Blessed is he who in tears has become like unto a cloud, and daily uses them to extinguish the fiery flame of the evil passions.
Blessed is he who excels in good measures of ascetic feats, hoping to receive from God the heavenly kingdom.
Blessed is he who like a fire is ablaze with love and has burned up in himself all impure thoughts and corruption of the soul.
Blessed is he who has found a choice heavenly pearl and, having sold all that he had on earth, has bought this one jewel.
Blessed is he who has found a treasure hidden in a field, rejoiced and cast aside all, and acquired this one piece of land.
Blessed is he who ceaselessly remembers the day of his departure and strives to be ready and fearless in that hour.
Blessed is he who finds boldness in the hour of his leave-taking, when the soul with fear and trembling bids farewell to the body, for the angels shall come to take his soul, to separate it from the body and place it before the throne at the immortal and terrible judgement place.
102
Adornment of our prayer, O Jesus, fortify our supplication, that it might ascend with Thee to Thy Father and obtain for us the object of our request!
Through Thy loving-kindness Thou defendest us before Thy Father, for Thou art the chosen sacrifice, offered for the world.
For Adam, who tasted the fruit, Thou didst embrace the pillar at the judgement place. For Adam's children, who sinned before Thee, the executioners pierced Thee with nails.
Thou hast taken upon Thyself the common debt of all in order to pay it back to Thy Father--pay back also, O guiltless Lord, those sins with which our freedom has indebted us.
Thou hast redeemed us from the curse of the law by Thy precious blood. Deliver also those redeemed by Thy blood from harsh justice.
May the debts of Thy servants not exceed the compassion of the kindhearted Lord, for no matter how great our errors might be, Thy loving-kindness is yet greater.
It is true that many, many debts are upon us, but Thou hast a multitude of compassions. And if truth itself should weigh them, then all our debts shall be less than Thy compassions.
Who shall set about weighing Thy compassions and comparing them to our iniquities? The mountains can be weighted, but Thy compassions are beyond measure.
Thy compassions are more precious than life, for life has its measure, but Thy compassions are immeasurable. May Thy compassions be also our rampart.
103
Arise, O soul that has grown old in sins, an renew thyself with repentance. From contrition and tears mix thyself an ointment and heal the wounds of the fallen image in thee. Call out from thy heart and expose thine iniquities, for the All-good One will spare thee who art fallen.
Thou hast loved beauty that is deceptive and transitory and ruined thine own beauty, O daughter of the light. The temple of thy body is disfigured with the recklessness to which thou hast enslave thyself.
Woe art thou, who art miserable! How long shalt thou occupy thyself with things that are transitory? Shudder and be horrified by the fire that thou hast kindled with thine errors.
The hideous sins that thou hast committed from thy youth have accumulated, rising higher than thy head. They have plunged thee into despair, and that is why thou art indifferent to repentance.
Remember that thou art held captive by lust. Remember that desire slew thy mother. How longsuffering the Good One is with thee, yet dost thou wallow in a sea of sin!
Can it be that thou dost not fear the day when thy sores and thy secrets shall be revealed? Who will defend thee in that place where every man will be preoccupied with his own judgement?
Thy possessions have made thee a hollow image; they have ruined thee and left thee.
O great Hope, Who hast appeared unto us in the last days, spare this soul that has withdrawn from Thee! I am Thy sheep, but long have I wandered far from Thee, serving the evil one. Go forth, O Lord and seek me out. Seek out Thy dominion, for in vain cares have I squandered Thy wealth!
For the sake of sinners didst Thou bear Thy cross, and I am one of them: turn not away from me. We are Thy dominion, but the Evil One has stolen us away. Rebuke him and take from him that which he has capture. Have mercy on me, O Lover of mankind, for I have no other hope but Thee.
Praise be to Thy compassions, O all-merciful Son of God, for Thou art long-suffering toward sinners. Thanks be to Thee from those who had perished, whom Thou didst gather together and bring to repentance.
104
How great is the grace of the God! How great is God's love for mankind! How He desires and encourages all men to save themselves! O Lord, spare also me, Thy useless servant; O merciful Christ our Savior, spare Thy creature.
If Thou, O Lord, wilt not give me who am miserable understanding, nor enlighten my heart, then, due to my great indifference, shall I be unable to recognize my ruin and decay.
Because I am trapped by the merciless enemy who oppresses me, with tears do I ceaselessly cry day and night to Thy goodness to deliver me from his snares. For hourly does he renew the trickery he wields against me; hourly does he disturb my soul with wanton thoughts and desire for pleasure.
May Thy power, O Christ, that rebuked the waves of the sea also rebuke him, that he may have no influence on me, Thy useless servant. Be quick to send, O Master, Thy grace, that it might drive away from Thy servant the great serpent and all his defilements and evil thoughts. For the wounds that his arrows have inflicted on my heart have become fetid sores, and I in my folly try to hide them every way I can.
The good Physician calls me and demands no payment, nor does he spill my blood. But my slothfulness prevents me from going to Him. He comes Himself to heal me, but always finds me engaged in acts and prevent His remedies from rendering me their healing power.
O Lord, enlighten and sober me. Cure me and I will be cured!
Blessed is he who in the Lord has become free of all the affairs of this vain life.
Blessed is he who has in mind the coming terrible judgement and tries to heal the wounds of his soul with tears.
Blessed is he who in tears has become like unto a cloud, and daily uses them to extinguish the fiery flame of the evil passions.
Blessed is he who excels in good measures of ascetic feats, hoping to receive from God the heavenly kingdom.
Blessed is he who like a fire is ablaze with love and has burned up in himself all impure thoughts and corruption of the soul.
Blessed is he who has found a choice heavenly pearl and, having sold all that he had on earth, has bought this one jewel.
Blessed is he who has found a treasure hidden in a field, rejoiced and cast aside all, and acquired this one piece of land.
Blessed is he who ceaselessly remembers the day of his departure and strives to be ready and fearless in that hour.
Blessed is he who finds boldness in the hour of his leave-taking, when the soul with fear and trembling bids farewell to the body, for the angels shall come to take his soul, to separate it from the body and place it before the throne at the immortal and terrible judgement place.
102
Adornment of our prayer, O Jesus, fortify our supplication, that it might ascend with Thee to Thy Father and obtain for us the object of our request!
Through Thy loving-kindness Thou defendest us before Thy Father, for Thou art the chosen sacrifice, offered for the world.
For Adam, who tasted the fruit, Thou didst embrace the pillar at the judgement place. For Adam's children, who sinned before Thee, the executioners pierced Thee with nails.
Thou hast taken upon Thyself the common debt of all in order to pay it back to Thy Father--pay back also, O guiltless Lord, those sins with which our freedom has indebted us.
Thou hast redeemed us from the curse of the law by Thy precious blood. Deliver also those redeemed by Thy blood from harsh justice.
May the debts of Thy servants not exceed the compassion of the kindhearted Lord, for no matter how great our errors might be, Thy loving-kindness is yet greater.
It is true that many, many debts are upon us, but Thou hast a multitude of compassions. And if truth itself should weigh them, then all our debts shall be less than Thy compassions.
Who shall set about weighing Thy compassions and comparing them to our iniquities? The mountains can be weighted, but Thy compassions are beyond measure.
Thy compassions are more precious than life, for life has its measure, but Thy compassions are immeasurable. May Thy compassions be also our rampart.
103
Arise, O soul that has grown old in sins, an renew thyself with repentance. From contrition and tears mix thyself an ointment and heal the wounds of the fallen image in thee. Call out from thy heart and expose thine iniquities, for the All-good One will spare thee who art fallen.
Thou hast loved beauty that is deceptive and transitory and ruined thine own beauty, O daughter of the light. The temple of thy body is disfigured with the recklessness to which thou hast enslave thyself.
Woe art thou, who art miserable! How long shalt thou occupy thyself with things that are transitory? Shudder and be horrified by the fire that thou hast kindled with thine errors.
The hideous sins that thou hast committed from thy youth have accumulated, rising higher than thy head. They have plunged thee into despair, and that is why thou art indifferent to repentance.
Remember that thou art held captive by lust. Remember that desire slew thy mother. How longsuffering the Good One is with thee, yet dost thou wallow in a sea of sin!
Can it be that thou dost not fear the day when thy sores and thy secrets shall be revealed? Who will defend thee in that place where every man will be preoccupied with his own judgement?
Thy possessions have made thee a hollow image; they have ruined thee and left thee.
O great Hope, Who hast appeared unto us in the last days, spare this soul that has withdrawn from Thee! I am Thy sheep, but long have I wandered far from Thee, serving the evil one. Go forth, O Lord and seek me out. Seek out Thy dominion, for in vain cares have I squandered Thy wealth!
For the sake of sinners didst Thou bear Thy cross, and I am one of them: turn not away from me. We are Thy dominion, but the Evil One has stolen us away. Rebuke him and take from him that which he has capture. Have mercy on me, O Lover of mankind, for I have no other hope but Thee.
Praise be to Thy compassions, O all-merciful Son of God, for Thou art long-suffering toward sinners. Thanks be to Thee from those who had perished, whom Thou didst gather together and bring to repentance.
104
How great is the grace of the God! How great is God's love for mankind! How He desires and encourages all men to save themselves! O Lord, spare also me, Thy useless servant; O merciful Christ our Savior, spare Thy creature.
If Thou, O Lord, wilt not give me who am miserable understanding, nor enlighten my heart, then, due to my great indifference, shall I be unable to recognize my ruin and decay.
Because I am trapped by the merciless enemy who oppresses me, with tears do I ceaselessly cry day and night to Thy goodness to deliver me from his snares. For hourly does he renew the trickery he wields against me; hourly does he disturb my soul with wanton thoughts and desire for pleasure.
May Thy power, O Christ, that rebuked the waves of the sea also rebuke him, that he may have no influence on me, Thy useless servant. Be quick to send, O Master, Thy grace, that it might drive away from Thy servant the great serpent and all his defilements and evil thoughts. For the wounds that his arrows have inflicted on my heart have become fetid sores, and I in my folly try to hide them every way I can.
The good Physician calls me and demands no payment, nor does he spill my blood. But my slothfulness prevents me from going to Him. He comes Himself to heal me, but always finds me engaged in acts and prevent His remedies from rendering me their healing power.
O Lord, enlighten and sober me. Cure me and I will be cured!
Sunday, April 06, 2008
A Spiritual Psalter from the works of our Holy Father Ephraim the Syrian
97
Accept from all of us , O our Lord, our prayer and service and supplication. Grant us hearts filled with love and the spirit of patience in sufferings.
May our mouths which confess the faith and our voices be lyres of praise. May the vigilance and labor that our bodies endure make Thee merciful in regard to our sins.
May our mouths that serve as lyres for Thee and our tongues that sing Thee praise not issue tormented cries, O Lord, for Thou hast vouchsafed them to sing Thee praise.
May our eyes that kept vigil though they were heavy-laden with sleep and our legs that exhausted themselves in standing before Thee not be deprived of hope, and may they not lose their reward in the day of reckoning.
May the sounds of our mouths and our songs not be turned into sobs and weeping; but according to Thy compassion, loving-kindness and goodness, accept our vigilance.
Vouch that we may stand before Thee with one soul, with a clean heart, and in harmony may we offer to Thee, O Lord, and to Thy Father and Thy Holy Spirit.
98
A mournful soul approaches Thee, O Holy Master, and with tears she falls down before Thy compassion.
Thou hast sworn by Thine Own Self that Thou desirest not the death of a sinner and would rather save him from his sins. And truly Thy goodness daily doth prevail over the errors of men. Thou hast mercy upon sinners just as Thou hast mercy upon those who walk in Thy commandments.
Thy compassion is everywhere declared in the Gospels and in the writings of the apostles. Thy holy fathers and teachers, both those who are named in the Church and those who are not, declare Thy compassion.
I know of the prodigal son, Manasseh, the thief, Zacchaeus, the publican, the harlot, the Canaanite woman, the woman with an issue of blood, the paralytic, the blind man, Jairus, and all whose stories have been written down--and I approach Thee.
Extend thy charity and accept me; quicken my mind and restrain me who often fall into my former iniquities and am mired in corrupt thoughts.
When thy grace comes to my heart she finds there the stench of corrupting thoughts. Therefore she instantly withdraws without finding an entrance or having an opportunity to enter and dwell in me as she would like.
Wash my heart with radiant bliss, that I might come to my senses and that Thy grace might make her dwelling in me, O all-compassionate Lord!
99
In a short time we shall pass through terrible and fearful places, and there is not one here who can avoid walking this path. There will b e no one there to accompany and assist us: neither parents nor brethren, nor friends, nor relatives, nor wealth, nor any other such thing.
If at that very hour we find ourselves stripped of God's protection, the princes of darkness shall certainly hold us back. They are unyielding and merciless; they fear not kings, nor do they respect masters; they honor neither the small nor the great. Only form those who live in piety do they withdraw in fear, allowing them free passage.
I imagine what this hour will be like and fall down before thy goodness, O Lord: give me not up to those who offend me, that Thine enemies might not boast that they have taken Thy servant, O good Lord. May they not gnash their teeth and terrify my sinful soul, saying: thou hast fallen into our hands, thou hast been handed over to us. That is the day for which we have waited.
No, O Lord, deal with me not according to mine iniquities and turn not Thy face away from me, Say not to me: Amen, I say to thee, I know thee not. Punish me, o Lord, according to Thy compassion, and may mine enemy not rejoice over me. Extinguish his fury, nullify all his actions, provide for me a path to Thee free from attacks and revilement.
Incline thine ear to my prayer, O good Lord, not because of my righteousness, but because of thy compassion and thy great mercy. Save my sorrowful soul from death. Thou art the Lord of all and Thou hast power over all creatures.
Thou hast said, O Lord: ask, and it shall be given to you: knock, and it shall be opened to you. Lo, I ask and I knock. Before my end comes, O Lord, cleanse me of all sin.
100
Get up, O soul. Thou hat slept till now in sin; shake off thy slumber; hurry, and seek refuge in repentance--and the Just One will perhaps be moved to mercy by thy tears. Put off from thy mind the veil of corruption, that thine eye might see rightly.
Hourly shed tears of contrition for thy shameful deeds before the Judge. And abyss of torment
awaits thee in return for thy deeds and thy depravity. Weep for thyself exceedingly, that the Just One might both hearken unto thee and make peace with thee.
Shudder, O unfortunate soul, and be terrified by the torments which thou hast prepared for thyself. Weep for thyself, thou who hast communed with the unclean powers, for the eternal fire shall follow thee everywhere. Deeply hast thou mired thyself in lust, and never didst thou break away from it.
Thy thoughts are encumbered with thorns and thistles, and thou hast yet to b ring forth fruits of repentance. The passions have convulsed thee like waves and drowned thy ship in a sea of sins.
Never didst thou b ring to mind that day when all that is hidden shall be subject to scrutiny. What wilt thou do when the voice, demanding that thou go to meet the Bridegroom, causes thee to tremble?
The light of thine eyes shall grow dark and vanish--and thou shalt be left outside with the foolish virgins.
Supply thyself with oil, O miserable soul, while there is still time to justify thyself. Beg for forgiveness of thy sins together with the harlot and heal thy wounds with thine own tears.
The door of repentance is yet open--enter and cleanse thyself from thy corruption.
Thou, who desirest the salvation of the sons of men, have compassion on this soul that has withdrawn from Thee. Accept her, O Lord, with Thy usual mercy. At the righteous judgement, may Thy compassion shelter me, who am sinful, and deliver me from torment.
Thou, who forgivest sins and freely grantest mercy, forgive me the sins of my soul at the righteous judgement! May the prodigals, whom Thou didst gather together and bring to repentance, exalt Thee.
Accept from all of us , O our Lord, our prayer and service and supplication. Grant us hearts filled with love and the spirit of patience in sufferings.
May our mouths which confess the faith and our voices be lyres of praise. May the vigilance and labor that our bodies endure make Thee merciful in regard to our sins.
May our mouths that serve as lyres for Thee and our tongues that sing Thee praise not issue tormented cries, O Lord, for Thou hast vouchsafed them to sing Thee praise.
May our eyes that kept vigil though they were heavy-laden with sleep and our legs that exhausted themselves in standing before Thee not be deprived of hope, and may they not lose their reward in the day of reckoning.
May the sounds of our mouths and our songs not be turned into sobs and weeping; but according to Thy compassion, loving-kindness and goodness, accept our vigilance.
Vouch that we may stand before Thee with one soul, with a clean heart, and in harmony may we offer to Thee, O Lord, and to Thy Father and Thy Holy Spirit.
98
A mournful soul approaches Thee, O Holy Master, and with tears she falls down before Thy compassion.
Thou hast sworn by Thine Own Self that Thou desirest not the death of a sinner and would rather save him from his sins. And truly Thy goodness daily doth prevail over the errors of men. Thou hast mercy upon sinners just as Thou hast mercy upon those who walk in Thy commandments.
Thy compassion is everywhere declared in the Gospels and in the writings of the apostles. Thy holy fathers and teachers, both those who are named in the Church and those who are not, declare Thy compassion.
I know of the prodigal son, Manasseh, the thief, Zacchaeus, the publican, the harlot, the Canaanite woman, the woman with an issue of blood, the paralytic, the blind man, Jairus, and all whose stories have been written down--and I approach Thee.
Extend thy charity and accept me; quicken my mind and restrain me who often fall into my former iniquities and am mired in corrupt thoughts.
When thy grace comes to my heart she finds there the stench of corrupting thoughts. Therefore she instantly withdraws without finding an entrance or having an opportunity to enter and dwell in me as she would like.
Wash my heart with radiant bliss, that I might come to my senses and that Thy grace might make her dwelling in me, O all-compassionate Lord!
99
In a short time we shall pass through terrible and fearful places, and there is not one here who can avoid walking this path. There will b e no one there to accompany and assist us: neither parents nor brethren, nor friends, nor relatives, nor wealth, nor any other such thing.
If at that very hour we find ourselves stripped of God's protection, the princes of darkness shall certainly hold us back. They are unyielding and merciless; they fear not kings, nor do they respect masters; they honor neither the small nor the great. Only form those who live in piety do they withdraw in fear, allowing them free passage.
I imagine what this hour will be like and fall down before thy goodness, O Lord: give me not up to those who offend me, that Thine enemies might not boast that they have taken Thy servant, O good Lord. May they not gnash their teeth and terrify my sinful soul, saying: thou hast fallen into our hands, thou hast been handed over to us. That is the day for which we have waited.
No, O Lord, deal with me not according to mine iniquities and turn not Thy face away from me, Say not to me: Amen, I say to thee, I know thee not. Punish me, o Lord, according to Thy compassion, and may mine enemy not rejoice over me. Extinguish his fury, nullify all his actions, provide for me a path to Thee free from attacks and revilement.
Incline thine ear to my prayer, O good Lord, not because of my righteousness, but because of thy compassion and thy great mercy. Save my sorrowful soul from death. Thou art the Lord of all and Thou hast power over all creatures.
Thou hast said, O Lord: ask, and it shall be given to you: knock, and it shall be opened to you. Lo, I ask and I knock. Before my end comes, O Lord, cleanse me of all sin.
100
Get up, O soul. Thou hat slept till now in sin; shake off thy slumber; hurry, and seek refuge in repentance--and the Just One will perhaps be moved to mercy by thy tears. Put off from thy mind the veil of corruption, that thine eye might see rightly.
Hourly shed tears of contrition for thy shameful deeds before the Judge. And abyss of torment
awaits thee in return for thy deeds and thy depravity. Weep for thyself exceedingly, that the Just One might both hearken unto thee and make peace with thee.
Shudder, O unfortunate soul, and be terrified by the torments which thou hast prepared for thyself. Weep for thyself, thou who hast communed with the unclean powers, for the eternal fire shall follow thee everywhere. Deeply hast thou mired thyself in lust, and never didst thou break away from it.
Thy thoughts are encumbered with thorns and thistles, and thou hast yet to b ring forth fruits of repentance. The passions have convulsed thee like waves and drowned thy ship in a sea of sins.
Never didst thou b ring to mind that day when all that is hidden shall be subject to scrutiny. What wilt thou do when the voice, demanding that thou go to meet the Bridegroom, causes thee to tremble?
The light of thine eyes shall grow dark and vanish--and thou shalt be left outside with the foolish virgins.
Supply thyself with oil, O miserable soul, while there is still time to justify thyself. Beg for forgiveness of thy sins together with the harlot and heal thy wounds with thine own tears.
The door of repentance is yet open--enter and cleanse thyself from thy corruption.
Thou, who desirest the salvation of the sons of men, have compassion on this soul that has withdrawn from Thee. Accept her, O Lord, with Thy usual mercy. At the righteous judgement, may Thy compassion shelter me, who am sinful, and deliver me from torment.
Thou, who forgivest sins and freely grantest mercy, forgive me the sins of my soul at the righteous judgement! May the prodigals, whom Thou didst gather together and bring to repentance, exalt Thee.
Friday, April 04, 2008
A Spiritual Psalter from the works of our Holy Father Ephraim the Syrian
93
There will come a time filled with fear and trembling, when all that each person has done in secret and in darkness shall be revealed--woe to the soul that does not have the Lord as her helper.
My heart sighs and my eyes long for tears, but my sin holds my mind captive, that I might not feel contrition and beseech the Lord not to cast me not outer darkness.
While we yet have strength, let us work for the Lord in rightness of heart, that in the time of sorrow we might have Him as our helper Who shall deliver us from all misfortune.
Like a man who walks with a candlestick and gives light to those who are with him, so does virtue, which always carries glory with it, also give light.
Until you resolved in your mind finally to leave this life and to consider this world and its glory but a despoiled tabernacle--until such a time, it will be impossible to overcome the earthly passions and worldly lusts that plunge a man into utter destruction and ruin.
It does not take a great effort to lay a foundation, but it is difficult to complete the building. The taller the building, the more work it presents for the builder right up until it is finished.
This is what happens to those who come to work for the Lord: first there is temptation, then sorrows, and next follow labor, despondency, nakedness, suffering, lack of privacy and humiliation. He will prevail who with all his heart dedicates himself to God's guidance and God's will. god requires from us only our consummate determination; it is He Who gives us strength and grants us victory.
94
Praise to the All-good One, Who because of His love has revealed glory to the sons of men! From dust did He create a voiceless being and adorn him with a soul, a proprietress of heavenly treasures.
He gave these lips of dust the capacity to magnify Him, so that through them all creation might sing praise unto Him.
Come, ye who are endowed with speech, let us sing praise unto Him until we repose in the sleep of death.
Every night shall we contemplate death which will stop our lips and lay silence upon us.
The righteous who spent their nights in vigilance live even dafter death; but the lawless, who reject the glory of the Son of God, are already dead while they yet live.
Let us rouse our bodies with psalms and spiritual hymns that we might join the wise virgins whom our Lord praised, and in vigilance behold His glory in the night that will cause the world to tremble.
Let us not wallow in pleasures, that we might behold His glory in the day of His coming. Let us stand before Him as watchful servants, ready for the hour when He will bring the sons of men to the judgement.
The body that burdened itself with prayer shall soar through the air on the day of the resurrection; without shame shall it behold its Lord; with Him shall it enter into the habitation of light, where it will be cherished by the angels and by those who here burdened themselves with vigilance and prayer.
Blessed is He Who made us instruments of His glory and put exaltation in our unworthy lips! Praise be to His compassion, for He has made those who were of dust concelebrants with the angels, that every night and at all times they might sing His holy name.
95
Praise God in the morning, ye children of the Church. Every morning let us exalt the Good One and worship Him, Who arranged the luminaries in the day and night skies.
When the veil of night is lifted and God's light has shone forth over creation, the arrival of morning wakes those who sleep. May Thy light, O Lord, irradiate our hearts.
Thyself, O our Lord, teach us to exalt Thee and put life in our souls. As Thou hast let us out of darkness, so also deliver us from gehenna.
According to Thy mercy, nourish the children of the Church, who have cleaved themselves unto Thee. May Thy loving-kindness be our helper, O Lord of the morning and the evening.
May Thy grace, O Lord, accompany us and lead us to the great morning. May Thy generous right hand shower us with blessings and bring us across the sea of fire.
May heaven and earth and all that is within them together exalt Thee at our return. Exaltation to Thee, to the Father Whom we worship, to Thine Only-begotten Son, and to the Holy Spirit.
96
Every evening mayest Thou be praised from the lips of all men! Thou gavest them the day to labor and work to acquire nourishment. Now, exhausted by their heavy labor, they thank Thee for granting them rest.
Who shall not worship Thee, Who carest for us men with such love? Thou leadest out the stars and causest the approach of evening which brings a halt to the day-long labors of those who have exhausted themselves with work.
The evening comes and consoles those who, in their struggle with hunger and thirst, have wearied and exhausted themselves with labor. Evening time comes and gladdens the world and its toilers.
Blessed is Thy greatness, that has from the beginning been ever mindful of us men!
Thou providest rest for both men and beasts in the the evening time. May Thy Cross, O Lord, which is the seal of the Church and protects Here children from Satan and his warriors, be the comfort of Thy sheep, whom Thou hast redeemed with Thy life-creating blood!
Send Thy peace, O Lord, to all the ends of the universe, and may the Evil One flee from our midst.
May every tongue and every mouth offer Thee praise from all the ends of the earth.
With them do we also glorify Thee, O Lord, and Thy Father and the Holy Spirit.
There will come a time filled with fear and trembling, when all that each person has done in secret and in darkness shall be revealed--woe to the soul that does not have the Lord as her helper.
My heart sighs and my eyes long for tears, but my sin holds my mind captive, that I might not feel contrition and beseech the Lord not to cast me not outer darkness.
While we yet have strength, let us work for the Lord in rightness of heart, that in the time of sorrow we might have Him as our helper Who shall deliver us from all misfortune.
Like a man who walks with a candlestick and gives light to those who are with him, so does virtue, which always carries glory with it, also give light.
Until you resolved in your mind finally to leave this life and to consider this world and its glory but a despoiled tabernacle--until such a time, it will be impossible to overcome the earthly passions and worldly lusts that plunge a man into utter destruction and ruin.
It does not take a great effort to lay a foundation, but it is difficult to complete the building. The taller the building, the more work it presents for the builder right up until it is finished.
This is what happens to those who come to work for the Lord: first there is temptation, then sorrows, and next follow labor, despondency, nakedness, suffering, lack of privacy and humiliation. He will prevail who with all his heart dedicates himself to God's guidance and God's will. god requires from us only our consummate determination; it is He Who gives us strength and grants us victory.
94
Praise to the All-good One, Who because of His love has revealed glory to the sons of men! From dust did He create a voiceless being and adorn him with a soul, a proprietress of heavenly treasures.
He gave these lips of dust the capacity to magnify Him, so that through them all creation might sing praise unto Him.
Come, ye who are endowed with speech, let us sing praise unto Him until we repose in the sleep of death.
Every night shall we contemplate death which will stop our lips and lay silence upon us.
The righteous who spent their nights in vigilance live even dafter death; but the lawless, who reject the glory of the Son of God, are already dead while they yet live.
Let us rouse our bodies with psalms and spiritual hymns that we might join the wise virgins whom our Lord praised, and in vigilance behold His glory in the night that will cause the world to tremble.
Let us not wallow in pleasures, that we might behold His glory in the day of His coming. Let us stand before Him as watchful servants, ready for the hour when He will bring the sons of men to the judgement.
The body that burdened itself with prayer shall soar through the air on the day of the resurrection; without shame shall it behold its Lord; with Him shall it enter into the habitation of light, where it will be cherished by the angels and by those who here burdened themselves with vigilance and prayer.
Blessed is He Who made us instruments of His glory and put exaltation in our unworthy lips! Praise be to His compassion, for He has made those who were of dust concelebrants with the angels, that every night and at all times they might sing His holy name.
95
Praise God in the morning, ye children of the Church. Every morning let us exalt the Good One and worship Him, Who arranged the luminaries in the day and night skies.
When the veil of night is lifted and God's light has shone forth over creation, the arrival of morning wakes those who sleep. May Thy light, O Lord, irradiate our hearts.
Thyself, O our Lord, teach us to exalt Thee and put life in our souls. As Thou hast let us out of darkness, so also deliver us from gehenna.
According to Thy mercy, nourish the children of the Church, who have cleaved themselves unto Thee. May Thy loving-kindness be our helper, O Lord of the morning and the evening.
May Thy grace, O Lord, accompany us and lead us to the great morning. May Thy generous right hand shower us with blessings and bring us across the sea of fire.
May heaven and earth and all that is within them together exalt Thee at our return. Exaltation to Thee, to the Father Whom we worship, to Thine Only-begotten Son, and to the Holy Spirit.
96
Every evening mayest Thou be praised from the lips of all men! Thou gavest them the day to labor and work to acquire nourishment. Now, exhausted by their heavy labor, they thank Thee for granting them rest.
Who shall not worship Thee, Who carest for us men with such love? Thou leadest out the stars and causest the approach of evening which brings a halt to the day-long labors of those who have exhausted themselves with work.
The evening comes and consoles those who, in their struggle with hunger and thirst, have wearied and exhausted themselves with labor. Evening time comes and gladdens the world and its toilers.
Blessed is Thy greatness, that has from the beginning been ever mindful of us men!
Thou providest rest for both men and beasts in the the evening time. May Thy Cross, O Lord, which is the seal of the Church and protects Here children from Satan and his warriors, be the comfort of Thy sheep, whom Thou hast redeemed with Thy life-creating blood!
Send Thy peace, O Lord, to all the ends of the universe, and may the Evil One flee from our midst.
May every tongue and every mouth offer Thee praise from all the ends of the earth.
With them do we also glorify Thee, O Lord, and Thy Father and the Holy Spirit.
Thursday, April 03, 2008
A Spiritual Psalter from the works of our Holy Father Ephraim the Syrian
89
O how insensitive I am! How coarse, how earth-like has my soul become! O dissolute heart, O lips filled with bitterness, O throat which is an open grave!
Why dost thou not remember, O soul, that thy departure approaches inescapably? Why dost thou not prepare for this journey? Why dost thou, with no pity for thyself, pursue ruin? Why dost thou bring upon thyself eternal torment? What art thou doing, O soul, that thou livest like a beast lacking reason and understanding?
Alas, how I choose darkness instead of light! How I prefer that pleasure which I have today and which tomorrow will be gone, above eternal and unutterable bliss!
Alas, how I agree to be dressed in a dark and gloomy garment rather than in a robe radiant like the sun! How I prefer the miserable dwelling places of hell over the heavenly kingdom!
Woe is me, a sinner! I on my own, voluntarily, knowingly cast myself into utter ruin.
Come at last to thy senses, O my soul; fear God and bravely take up the journey along the path of His commandments.
Understand, O soul, that this age is like unto a battlefield, and the cunning serpent endeavors to secure victory by any means. He is overthrown and reviled by some, but others does he himself overthrow and subject to reviling.
Some, who are deceived by him, are overcome; and others enter into battle with him and are crowned. Some, having tasted his bitterness, attain the delights of eternal life; and others, who have tasted his sensual sweets, obtain the bitterness of eternal torment.
Some, through their extreme abstinence, readily take the upper hand against him; and other,s because of their attachment to earthly things, are easily overcome by him. For those who love God with all their heart, warfare with him means nothing at all; but for those who love the world it is difficult and insuperable.
Comprehend, O pitiful sou, that the joy, splendor, and leisure of this age are filled with sadness and grief; but sorrows, deprivation and self-disparagement gain unutterable joy and eternal life.
Resolve to step upon the path that is strait and sorrowful and labor in silence, that when the hour of death and departure comes thou wilt not be found unprepared.
90
On my bed I meditated on Thee, Lover of me; and at midnight I arose to glorify Thy goodness. I recalled my debts and my sins and shed streams of tears. They reassured me--the thief, the publican, Mary the harlot, the Canaanite woman, and even the woman with an issue of blood and the Samaritan woman by the well. They said to me: Get up, beg for mercy--your Lord is plenteous in mercy.
David, the son of Jesse, called out to me in his psalms; he awoke me from the sleep that burdened my limbs and said to me: Get up, O man. Why do you sleep? the Judge accepts offerings at midnight. Get up, pray, and ask for forgiveness. The kindhearted Lord will rejoice in you. His door is open to the penitent day and night.
At night, as I rested on my bed, I recalled my debts and sins. Then terror embraced me and I cried out: alas, the terrible night and the darkness void of all light are approaching. Whosoever leads an illicit life shall not rejoice on the day of resurrection, but will ever remain in darkness.
David too lay awake on his bed at night, contemplated his iniquities and confessed his sins. At night he watered his bed with the tears of his eyes, and with sighs he prayed: I know, O Lord, mine iniquity, and my sin is before me continually. Against Thee only, O Lord, have I sinned--have mercy on me.
I call upon Thee, Father, Son and Holy Spirit; Thee do I beseech day and night--spare us. According to the multitude of Thy compassions, cleanse our sins and iniquities. Grant us, O Lord, health of soul and body; deliver us from the evil one and from his power and from his way and from all his snares, and refuse us no Thy compassion, neither by day nor by night.
91
Let us awake from sleep and with sighs call out to the Lord. Day and night let us labor, attending to our correction while our life still lasts, until the time comes when there will be no more place for repentance. Let us stand vigilant at the Bridegroom's door, that we might enter with the Bridegroom into Hiss bridal chamber and inherit eternal life.
come, let us all sing praises to God at night and imitate the hosts of angels who ceaselessly praise Him. And our Savior, when He arises and comes, accompanied by the angels, and sees our wakefulness and our vigilance, will call us his good servants and will seat us at His banquet.
With the righteous, who have pleased God day and night, let us labor in good things, beg our Lord for mercy; and, singing with David, let us say: at midnight I arose to give thanks unto Thee because of Thy righteous judgements. Spare me and have mercy on me and vouchsafe me the inheritance of Thy kingdom.
I will not cease to praise Thee, O our Lord. Ceaselessly will I sing of Thy glory, that Thy truth might not condemn me. I know the extent of my guilt. I know that if Thou dost punish me according to my sins, then my inheritance will be gehenna. Then all hope will be lost. My prayer will be silenced. Have mercy on me therefore, and forgive me my debts.
I slipped and fell into sin. Extend to me Thy right hand and I will arise, like the harlot in Simon's house, like the thief on the cross. Have mercy on me, Thou Who art kindhearted to sinners.
92
Woe is me, who am careless! Woe is me, who disregard my salvation! Woe is me, who sin knowingly! I know that I do evil, yet I do not withdraw from evil. Woe is me, for I have no justification! According to my words I am numbered at Thy right hand, but according to my deeds I stand at Thy left.
To Thee, O only Lord Who bearest no grudges, do I confess my sins. Even were I to keep silent, Thou, O Lord, knowest all, and nothing is hidden before Thine eyes. For Thou, O Lord, hast said by Thy Prophet: declare your sins beforehand and you will be justified. And so I will say: I have sinned, O Lord, and I am not worthy to look up and behold the heights of heaven because of the multitude of mine iniquities.
What am I to do, I who am the most miserable of all men? I shall weep over myself day and night, while there is yet time to offer tears....Grant me tears of contrition, O only good and merciful Lord, that with them I might gain from Thee purification from the defilement of my heart.
alas, thou hast sinned, O my soul! Repent, for our days pass like a shadow. In a short while thou wilt depart from here. Thou shalt pass through terrible places, O my soul. Do not postpone turning to the Lord day after day.
Woe is me, O my soul! thou hast driven God's mercy away from thyself with thy foul deeds. Give thyself no rest; day and night fall down before Him Who is Good and loves mankind, that thou mightest be given grace and mercy from on high.
O how insensitive I am! How coarse, how earth-like has my soul become! O dissolute heart, O lips filled with bitterness, O throat which is an open grave!
Why dost thou not remember, O soul, that thy departure approaches inescapably? Why dost thou not prepare for this journey? Why dost thou, with no pity for thyself, pursue ruin? Why dost thou bring upon thyself eternal torment? What art thou doing, O soul, that thou livest like a beast lacking reason and understanding?
Alas, how I choose darkness instead of light! How I prefer that pleasure which I have today and which tomorrow will be gone, above eternal and unutterable bliss!
Alas, how I agree to be dressed in a dark and gloomy garment rather than in a robe radiant like the sun! How I prefer the miserable dwelling places of hell over the heavenly kingdom!
Woe is me, a sinner! I on my own, voluntarily, knowingly cast myself into utter ruin.
Come at last to thy senses, O my soul; fear God and bravely take up the journey along the path of His commandments.
Understand, O soul, that this age is like unto a battlefield, and the cunning serpent endeavors to secure victory by any means. He is overthrown and reviled by some, but others does he himself overthrow and subject to reviling.
Some, who are deceived by him, are overcome; and others enter into battle with him and are crowned. Some, having tasted his bitterness, attain the delights of eternal life; and others, who have tasted his sensual sweets, obtain the bitterness of eternal torment.
Some, through their extreme abstinence, readily take the upper hand against him; and other,s because of their attachment to earthly things, are easily overcome by him. For those who love God with all their heart, warfare with him means nothing at all; but for those who love the world it is difficult and insuperable.
Comprehend, O pitiful sou, that the joy, splendor, and leisure of this age are filled with sadness and grief; but sorrows, deprivation and self-disparagement gain unutterable joy and eternal life.
Resolve to step upon the path that is strait and sorrowful and labor in silence, that when the hour of death and departure comes thou wilt not be found unprepared.
90
On my bed I meditated on Thee, Lover of me; and at midnight I arose to glorify Thy goodness. I recalled my debts and my sins and shed streams of tears. They reassured me--the thief, the publican, Mary the harlot, the Canaanite woman, and even the woman with an issue of blood and the Samaritan woman by the well. They said to me: Get up, beg for mercy--your Lord is plenteous in mercy.
David, the son of Jesse, called out to me in his psalms; he awoke me from the sleep that burdened my limbs and said to me: Get up, O man. Why do you sleep? the Judge accepts offerings at midnight. Get up, pray, and ask for forgiveness. The kindhearted Lord will rejoice in you. His door is open to the penitent day and night.
At night, as I rested on my bed, I recalled my debts and sins. Then terror embraced me and I cried out: alas, the terrible night and the darkness void of all light are approaching. Whosoever leads an illicit life shall not rejoice on the day of resurrection, but will ever remain in darkness.
David too lay awake on his bed at night, contemplated his iniquities and confessed his sins. At night he watered his bed with the tears of his eyes, and with sighs he prayed: I know, O Lord, mine iniquity, and my sin is before me continually. Against Thee only, O Lord, have I sinned--have mercy on me.
I call upon Thee, Father, Son and Holy Spirit; Thee do I beseech day and night--spare us. According to the multitude of Thy compassions, cleanse our sins and iniquities. Grant us, O Lord, health of soul and body; deliver us from the evil one and from his power and from his way and from all his snares, and refuse us no Thy compassion, neither by day nor by night.
91
Let us awake from sleep and with sighs call out to the Lord. Day and night let us labor, attending to our correction while our life still lasts, until the time comes when there will be no more place for repentance. Let us stand vigilant at the Bridegroom's door, that we might enter with the Bridegroom into Hiss bridal chamber and inherit eternal life.
come, let us all sing praises to God at night and imitate the hosts of angels who ceaselessly praise Him. And our Savior, when He arises and comes, accompanied by the angels, and sees our wakefulness and our vigilance, will call us his good servants and will seat us at His banquet.
With the righteous, who have pleased God day and night, let us labor in good things, beg our Lord for mercy; and, singing with David, let us say: at midnight I arose to give thanks unto Thee because of Thy righteous judgements. Spare me and have mercy on me and vouchsafe me the inheritance of Thy kingdom.
I will not cease to praise Thee, O our Lord. Ceaselessly will I sing of Thy glory, that Thy truth might not condemn me. I know the extent of my guilt. I know that if Thou dost punish me according to my sins, then my inheritance will be gehenna. Then all hope will be lost. My prayer will be silenced. Have mercy on me therefore, and forgive me my debts.
I slipped and fell into sin. Extend to me Thy right hand and I will arise, like the harlot in Simon's house, like the thief on the cross. Have mercy on me, Thou Who art kindhearted to sinners.
92
Woe is me, who am careless! Woe is me, who disregard my salvation! Woe is me, who sin knowingly! I know that I do evil, yet I do not withdraw from evil. Woe is me, for I have no justification! According to my words I am numbered at Thy right hand, but according to my deeds I stand at Thy left.
To Thee, O only Lord Who bearest no grudges, do I confess my sins. Even were I to keep silent, Thou, O Lord, knowest all, and nothing is hidden before Thine eyes. For Thou, O Lord, hast said by Thy Prophet: declare your sins beforehand and you will be justified. And so I will say: I have sinned, O Lord, and I am not worthy to look up and behold the heights of heaven because of the multitude of mine iniquities.
What am I to do, I who am the most miserable of all men? I shall weep over myself day and night, while there is yet time to offer tears....Grant me tears of contrition, O only good and merciful Lord, that with them I might gain from Thee purification from the defilement of my heart.
alas, thou hast sinned, O my soul! Repent, for our days pass like a shadow. In a short while thou wilt depart from here. Thou shalt pass through terrible places, O my soul. Do not postpone turning to the Lord day after day.
Woe is me, O my soul! thou hast driven God's mercy away from thyself with thy foul deeds. Give thyself no rest; day and night fall down before Him Who is Good and loves mankind, that thou mightest be given grace and mercy from on high.
Wednesday, April 02, 2008
A Spiritual Psalter from the works of our Holy Father Ephraim the Syrian
85
Blessed is he who contemplates the multitudes who rest in their graves and has rejected all fetid lust, for he will rise in glory when the heavenly trumpet is sounded to rouse all of the sons of men.
Blessed is he who hopes not on man, but on the Lord, Who is coming again with great glory to pass righteous judgement on the universe, for he will be like unto a tree growing by the waterside, and will bring forth fruit without ceasing.
Blessed is he whose mind has through grace become like a cloud full of rain watering the souls of mortals that they might cultivate the fruits of life, for grace will give him eternal praise.
Blessed is he who ever exercises restraint as God wills, for in the day of judgement God Himself will defend him. He will inherit the bridal chamber and will meet the Bridegroom with joy and gladness.
Blessed is he who has hated and left behind all the secular ways of men, whose every thought is about the one God.
Blessed is he who has hated pernicious sin and been repelled by it, and has loved instead the one good and man-befriending God.
Blessed is he who on earth has become like unto a heavenly angle and imitates the seraphim, whose thoughts are ever blameless.
Blessed is he who has become blameless before God and cleansed of all defilement--of wicked thoughts and deeds.
86
May Thy compassion be praised, O Christ our King, O Son of God worshipped by all! Thou art our King, Thou art our God, Thou art the author of our life and our great hope.
With one soul do both the heavenly hosts and the ranks below praise Thee and sing unto Thee a song of thanks, for Thou Who wast concealed hast in the last days appeared in the flesh of us mortals.
When Thy compassion was aroused and when it pleased Thy love to do so, Thou didst come for our redemption and liberate our race.
Thou didst cure our afflictions, cleanse our sins and, according to Thy Compassion, Thou didst raise those who were dead.
Thou didst establish on earth the holy Church in the image of the heavenly kingdom: Thou didst build her with love, establish her with compassion, and Thou didst spiritually betroth Thyself to her, and gain her by Thy suffering.
But the hater of mankind, in his shameless impudence, attacks her in the person of her servers.
O Lord, do not leave Thy holy Church without Thy care, that the promise that Thou didst utter concerning her invincibility may not be shown false.
Do not let her majestic beauty be disfigured or her wealth be stolen.
Fulfill Thy promise that Thou didst make to Peter; seal Thy words with deeds.
Fortify her gates, strengthen her bars, exalt her horn, raise up her head.
Bless her sons, preserve her children, give peace to her priests and subdue those who wish her evil.
May Thy peace dwell in her and drive away from her all evil schisms.
Grant that we may lead a calm, peaceful life in fear of Thee.
May we maintain our faith with great confidence and perfect love.
May our life be pleasing to Thee and may we find compassion in Thee in the day of reckoning.
May we ceaselessly bring praise to Thee, O Lord, and to Thy Father and to the Holy Spirit.
87
Thou Who art kindhearted to sinners, be merciful also to us in the day of judgement. Forgive us our debts according to Thy loving-kindness and in the day of Thy coming vouchsafe us Thy habitation.
When the multitudes to be judged tremble before the righteous judgement and stand before Thee stripped bare and in fear---then, O my Judge, have mercy on me for I have sung of Thy glory.
When the lips of the wise are stopped and Thy terrifying mighty scepter looms ominously before all, then may my lips be opened, for I have confessed Thee.
When neither friend nor acquaintance can save a man and every man is bought naked to account for himself--then, O Lord, be my intercessor, for I have hoped in Thee.
When the sound of the trumpet blares out, the nations shudder and every man is to receive reckoning according to his labors--then , O Lord, my helper, for to Thee do I run.
Accept our service, O Lord, hope of those above and hope of those below, and have mercy on us.
Be merciful to us, O Lord, be merciful to our parents; be merciful to our teachers, be merciful to our brethren.
Be merciful to us, O Lord, and give rest to our relatives who have reposed and to all who have died and did confess Thee, believe in Thee and taste Thy flesh and drink Thy life-creating blood.
Vouchsafe us together with Thy sheep to enter into Thy pasture, and together with Thy saints to offer Thee praise in accordance with Thy greatness unto the ages of ages.
88
O Good Mother of the All0good God: look upon the prayer of thine unworthy servant with thy merciful eye and grant me the contrition, quietness of thoughts, constancy of mind, chaste reason, sobriety of soul, humble thinking, radiance of spirit, prudent disposition, and spiritual peace that the Lord granted His disciples.
Blot out the record of my falls into sin, cleave the clouds of my sorrow, the haze and tumult of my thoughts. Remove from em the tempest and tumult of passions; enlarge my heart with spiritual breadth, give me joy and gladness and grant that I may walk the right path of Thy Son's commandments and properly pass through life without faltering and with an untainted conscience.
Also grant me who pray before thee pure prayer, that with an untroubled mind and concentrated thought I might always offer prayer to the honor, glory, and magnification of thine only-begotten Son, our Lord Jesus Christ.
Blessed is he who contemplates the multitudes who rest in their graves and has rejected all fetid lust, for he will rise in glory when the heavenly trumpet is sounded to rouse all of the sons of men.
Blessed is he who hopes not on man, but on the Lord, Who is coming again with great glory to pass righteous judgement on the universe, for he will be like unto a tree growing by the waterside, and will bring forth fruit without ceasing.
Blessed is he whose mind has through grace become like a cloud full of rain watering the souls of mortals that they might cultivate the fruits of life, for grace will give him eternal praise.
Blessed is he who ever exercises restraint as God wills, for in the day of judgement God Himself will defend him. He will inherit the bridal chamber and will meet the Bridegroom with joy and gladness.
Blessed is he who has hated and left behind all the secular ways of men, whose every thought is about the one God.
Blessed is he who has hated pernicious sin and been repelled by it, and has loved instead the one good and man-befriending God.
Blessed is he who on earth has become like unto a heavenly angle and imitates the seraphim, whose thoughts are ever blameless.
Blessed is he who has become blameless before God and cleansed of all defilement--of wicked thoughts and deeds.
86
May Thy compassion be praised, O Christ our King, O Son of God worshipped by all! Thou art our King, Thou art our God, Thou art the author of our life and our great hope.
With one soul do both the heavenly hosts and the ranks below praise Thee and sing unto Thee a song of thanks, for Thou Who wast concealed hast in the last days appeared in the flesh of us mortals.
When Thy compassion was aroused and when it pleased Thy love to do so, Thou didst come for our redemption and liberate our race.
Thou didst cure our afflictions, cleanse our sins and, according to Thy Compassion, Thou didst raise those who were dead.
Thou didst establish on earth the holy Church in the image of the heavenly kingdom: Thou didst build her with love, establish her with compassion, and Thou didst spiritually betroth Thyself to her, and gain her by Thy suffering.
But the hater of mankind, in his shameless impudence, attacks her in the person of her servers.
O Lord, do not leave Thy holy Church without Thy care, that the promise that Thou didst utter concerning her invincibility may not be shown false.
Do not let her majestic beauty be disfigured or her wealth be stolen.
Fulfill Thy promise that Thou didst make to Peter; seal Thy words with deeds.
Fortify her gates, strengthen her bars, exalt her horn, raise up her head.
Bless her sons, preserve her children, give peace to her priests and subdue those who wish her evil.
May Thy peace dwell in her and drive away from her all evil schisms.
Grant that we may lead a calm, peaceful life in fear of Thee.
May we maintain our faith with great confidence and perfect love.
May our life be pleasing to Thee and may we find compassion in Thee in the day of reckoning.
May we ceaselessly bring praise to Thee, O Lord, and to Thy Father and to the Holy Spirit.
87
Thou Who art kindhearted to sinners, be merciful also to us in the day of judgement. Forgive us our debts according to Thy loving-kindness and in the day of Thy coming vouchsafe us Thy habitation.
When the multitudes to be judged tremble before the righteous judgement and stand before Thee stripped bare and in fear---then, O my Judge, have mercy on me for I have sung of Thy glory.
When the lips of the wise are stopped and Thy terrifying mighty scepter looms ominously before all, then may my lips be opened, for I have confessed Thee.
When neither friend nor acquaintance can save a man and every man is bought naked to account for himself--then, O Lord, be my intercessor, for I have hoped in Thee.
When the sound of the trumpet blares out, the nations shudder and every man is to receive reckoning according to his labors--then , O Lord, my helper, for to Thee do I run.
Accept our service, O Lord, hope of those above and hope of those below, and have mercy on us.
Be merciful to us, O Lord, be merciful to our parents; be merciful to our teachers, be merciful to our brethren.
Be merciful to us, O Lord, and give rest to our relatives who have reposed and to all who have died and did confess Thee, believe in Thee and taste Thy flesh and drink Thy life-creating blood.
Vouchsafe us together with Thy sheep to enter into Thy pasture, and together with Thy saints to offer Thee praise in accordance with Thy greatness unto the ages of ages.
88
O Good Mother of the All0good God: look upon the prayer of thine unworthy servant with thy merciful eye and grant me the contrition, quietness of thoughts, constancy of mind, chaste reason, sobriety of soul, humble thinking, radiance of spirit, prudent disposition, and spiritual peace that the Lord granted His disciples.
Blot out the record of my falls into sin, cleave the clouds of my sorrow, the haze and tumult of my thoughts. Remove from em the tempest and tumult of passions; enlarge my heart with spiritual breadth, give me joy and gladness and grant that I may walk the right path of Thy Son's commandments and properly pass through life without faltering and with an untainted conscience.
Also grant me who pray before thee pure prayer, that with an untroubled mind and concentrated thought I might always offer prayer to the honor, glory, and magnification of thine only-begotten Son, our Lord Jesus Christ.
Tuesday, April 01, 2008
A Spiritual Psalter from the works of our Holy Father Ephraim the Syrian
81
Alas, I am an embarrassment to those who now respect me; may I not be ashamed before them when my hidden sins are revealed. I am an embarrassment to those who bore me; may they not later condemn me, who vowed not to live a worldly life.
I want to become like unto the widow who continually troubled the judge and achieved her goal. Before Thee, my All-Good Master, I want to be like Thine inseparable friend, that Thou mightest return my soul held captive by sins: he asked for bread to alleviate his hunger, and I ask for spiritual comfort. He asked for food for the flesh, and I ask Thee to summon my soul.
Because Thou art All-Good, hearken unto the voice of my tearful lamentation and convert me, that I might bring forth the fruit of repentance. Bedew my burning conscience; renew me who had grown old in sinful passions, that released from their slavery I might gladly breathe the air of freedom and glorify Thy goodness with joy and delight.
Thou knowest, O Master, that I dare thus address Thee, because my soul is prepared to labor if only a little. For I, a sinner, know that Thou art compassionate, O Lord, and that Thou wantest me to change my ways--Thou also desiresst the fruit of good will. Thou art ready to have mercy on me, but Thou awaitest a good disposition in me, for in Thy mercy wouldst Thou teach me good, and in Thy forgiveness dost Thou desire to make me worthy to partake of Thy kingdom.
82
Grant me, O Lord, both in wakefulness to stand pure before Thee, my Redeemer, and in slumber to partake of sleep without sin.
If in wakefulness I commit transgressions, may I be cleansed by Thy grace, O Lord. And if I sin while asleep, may Thy loving-kindness be unto me purification.
With the cross of Thy humility, make my sleep untroubled, preserve me from the iniquitous dreams of sleep and from the impure conjurings of the imagination. Grant that I might spend the whole night in peaceful sleep and that evil and deleterious thoughts might not take possession of me.
With Thy life-creating Body, of which I have partaken, preserve me from impure lust, that I might lie down and fall asleep in peace. May Thy Blood protect me. And grant my soul, that is Thine image, the freedom that is proper to Thine image. And my Thy right arm shelter my body that was made by Thy hands.
Encircle me with the wall of Thy compassions like a defensive shield. And when my body rests and sleeps, may Thy goodness be my guard, that the Evil One might not approach my bed. By the protection of the Mother who bore Thee, by the sacrifice that Thou hast offered for all men, I beseech Thee: drive away Satan, that he might no trouble me.
In me, O Lord, fulfill Thy promise and preserve my life by Thy Cross. I shall praise Thee when I awake for showing me who am miserable Thy love. May both those who sleep, resting in peace, and those who abide in wakefulness, girded by Thine armor, give praise to Thee, O Preserver Who livest eternally and Who hast aroused me to sing Thy glory.
83
Thy lips, O our Lord, have pronounced these promises: call Me and I will hearken unto you; knock at My door and I will open it.
Like the harlot do I call out to Thee: according to the superabundant compassion of Thy lovingkindness, forgive us our debts and our sins.
Like the publican do we beseech Thee, and like the prodigal son who squandered his inheritance do we call out to Thee, repenting in our soul: we have sinned against heaven and before Thee, O Lord.
Accept us, as thou hast promised, that the guardian angels and the archangels might rejoice over us. Thou who didst accept Simon's repentance, accept also the repentance of Thy servants and have mercy on us.
Come, O sinner who have sinned before the Lord, come to Him repenting in your soul, and He will forgive you your debts and your sins.
Shed tears at the Physician's door, sigh and beseech Him, who Him the scabs on your soul.
P:reserve your tongue from all manner of evil, and may your lips that were created for praise not pronounce words of blasphemy.
Forgive your brother if he has sinned against you, and Christ will forgive you as He has promised, according t His loving-kindness.
Have mercy on us, O our Lord, forgive us our debts and our sins and vouchsafe us Thy radiant habitation.
84
Before the wheel of time has completed its revolution with me--have mercy on me.
Before the wind of death has blown upon me and ailments have cropped up in my body foreboding the imminent end--have mercy.
Before the magnificent sun on high has grown dim before my eyes--have mercy, and may Thy light shine on me from on high and scatter the terrible darkness of my mind.
Before this dust has returned to the earth and decayed and all its beautiful features have rotted away--have mercy.
Before my sins have overtaken me at the judgement and shamed me before the Judge--have mercy on me, O Lord, Who art full of compassion.
Before the vanguard, preceding the Son of Heavenly King, marches forth to gather our miserable race before the Judge's throne--have mercy.
Before the sound of trumpets resounds portending Thy coming, O Jesus our Lord--spare Thy servants who beseech Thee and have mercy.
Before Thou hast shut Thy door against me, O Son of God, and I have become food for the inextinguishable fire of gehenna--have mercy on me.
Alas, I am an embarrassment to those who now respect me; may I not be ashamed before them when my hidden sins are revealed. I am an embarrassment to those who bore me; may they not later condemn me, who vowed not to live a worldly life.
I want to become like unto the widow who continually troubled the judge and achieved her goal. Before Thee, my All-Good Master, I want to be like Thine inseparable friend, that Thou mightest return my soul held captive by sins: he asked for bread to alleviate his hunger, and I ask for spiritual comfort. He asked for food for the flesh, and I ask Thee to summon my soul.
Because Thou art All-Good, hearken unto the voice of my tearful lamentation and convert me, that I might bring forth the fruit of repentance. Bedew my burning conscience; renew me who had grown old in sinful passions, that released from their slavery I might gladly breathe the air of freedom and glorify Thy goodness with joy and delight.
Thou knowest, O Master, that I dare thus address Thee, because my soul is prepared to labor if only a little. For I, a sinner, know that Thou art compassionate, O Lord, and that Thou wantest me to change my ways--Thou also desiresst the fruit of good will. Thou art ready to have mercy on me, but Thou awaitest a good disposition in me, for in Thy mercy wouldst Thou teach me good, and in Thy forgiveness dost Thou desire to make me worthy to partake of Thy kingdom.
82
Grant me, O Lord, both in wakefulness to stand pure before Thee, my Redeemer, and in slumber to partake of sleep without sin.
If in wakefulness I commit transgressions, may I be cleansed by Thy grace, O Lord. And if I sin while asleep, may Thy loving-kindness be unto me purification.
With the cross of Thy humility, make my sleep untroubled, preserve me from the iniquitous dreams of sleep and from the impure conjurings of the imagination. Grant that I might spend the whole night in peaceful sleep and that evil and deleterious thoughts might not take possession of me.
With Thy life-creating Body, of which I have partaken, preserve me from impure lust, that I might lie down and fall asleep in peace. May Thy Blood protect me. And grant my soul, that is Thine image, the freedom that is proper to Thine image. And my Thy right arm shelter my body that was made by Thy hands.
Encircle me with the wall of Thy compassions like a defensive shield. And when my body rests and sleeps, may Thy goodness be my guard, that the Evil One might not approach my bed. By the protection of the Mother who bore Thee, by the sacrifice that Thou hast offered for all men, I beseech Thee: drive away Satan, that he might no trouble me.
In me, O Lord, fulfill Thy promise and preserve my life by Thy Cross. I shall praise Thee when I awake for showing me who am miserable Thy love. May both those who sleep, resting in peace, and those who abide in wakefulness, girded by Thine armor, give praise to Thee, O Preserver Who livest eternally and Who hast aroused me to sing Thy glory.
83
Thy lips, O our Lord, have pronounced these promises: call Me and I will hearken unto you; knock at My door and I will open it.
Like the harlot do I call out to Thee: according to the superabundant compassion of Thy lovingkindness, forgive us our debts and our sins.
Like the publican do we beseech Thee, and like the prodigal son who squandered his inheritance do we call out to Thee, repenting in our soul: we have sinned against heaven and before Thee, O Lord.
Accept us, as thou hast promised, that the guardian angels and the archangels might rejoice over us. Thou who didst accept Simon's repentance, accept also the repentance of Thy servants and have mercy on us.
Come, O sinner who have sinned before the Lord, come to Him repenting in your soul, and He will forgive you your debts and your sins.
Shed tears at the Physician's door, sigh and beseech Him, who Him the scabs on your soul.
P:reserve your tongue from all manner of evil, and may your lips that were created for praise not pronounce words of blasphemy.
Forgive your brother if he has sinned against you, and Christ will forgive you as He has promised, according t His loving-kindness.
Have mercy on us, O our Lord, forgive us our debts and our sins and vouchsafe us Thy radiant habitation.
84
Before the wheel of time has completed its revolution with me--have mercy on me.
Before the wind of death has blown upon me and ailments have cropped up in my body foreboding the imminent end--have mercy.
Before the magnificent sun on high has grown dim before my eyes--have mercy, and may Thy light shine on me from on high and scatter the terrible darkness of my mind.
Before this dust has returned to the earth and decayed and all its beautiful features have rotted away--have mercy.
Before my sins have overtaken me at the judgement and shamed me before the Judge--have mercy on me, O Lord, Who art full of compassion.
Before the vanguard, preceding the Son of Heavenly King, marches forth to gather our miserable race before the Judge's throne--have mercy.
Before the sound of trumpets resounds portending Thy coming, O Jesus our Lord--spare Thy servants who beseech Thee and have mercy.
Before Thou hast shut Thy door against me, O Son of God, and I have become food for the inextinguishable fire of gehenna--have mercy on me.
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